There was this guy who believed very much in true love and decided to take his time to wait for his right girl to appear. He believed that there would definitely be someone special out there for him, but none came. Every year at Christmas, his ex-girlfriend would return from Vancouver to look him up. He was aware that she still held some hope of re-kindling the past romance with him. He did not wish to mislead her in any way. So he would always get one of his girl friends to pose as his steady whenever she came back. That went on for several years and each year, the guy would get a different girl to pose as his romantic interest. So whenever the ex-girlfriend came to visit him, she would be led into believing that it was all over between her and the guy. The girl took all those rather well, often trying to casually tease him about his different girlfriends, or so, as it seemed! In fact, the girl often wept in secret whenever she saw him with another girl, but she was too proud to admit it. Still, every Christmas, she returned, hoping to re-kindle some form of romance. But each time, she returned to Vancouver feeling disappointed.
Finally she decided that she could not play that game any longer. Therefore, she confronted him and professed that after all those years, he was still the only man that she had ever loved.
between them. Although he was touched by her undying love for him and wanted so much to accept her again, he remembered why he rejected her in the first place-she was not the one he wanted. So he hardened his heart and turned her down cruelly. Since then, three years have passed and the girl never return anymore. They never even wrote to each other. The guy went on with his life..... still searching for the one but somehow deep inside him, he missed the girl.On the Christmas of 1995, he went to his friend's party alone. "Hey, how come all alone this year? Where are all your girlfriends? What happened to that Vancouver babe who joins you every Christmas?", asked one of his friend. He felt warm and comforted by his friend's queries about her, still he just surged on.
Then, he came upon one of his many girlfriends whom he once requested to pose as his steady. He wanted so much to ignore her ..... not that he was impolite, but because at that moment, he just didn't feel comfortable with those girlfriends anymore. It was almost like he was being judged by them. The girl saw him and shouted across the floor for him. Unable to avoid her, he went up to acknowledge her.
Then, he came upon one of his many girlfriends whom he once requested to pose as his steady. He wanted so much to ignore her ..... not that he was impolite, but because at that moment, he just didn't feel comfortable with those girlfriends anymore. It was almost like he was being judged by them. The girl saw him and shouted across the floor for him. Unable to avoid her, he went up to acknowledge her.
"Hi......how are you? Enjoying the party?" the girl asked."Sure.....yeah!", he replied.
She was slightly tipsy..... must be from the whiskey on her hand. She continued,
"Why...? Don't you need someone to pose as your girlfriend this year?" Then he answered, "No, there is no need for that anymore......"
Before he can continue, he was interrupted, "Oh yes! Must have found a girlfriend! You haven't been searching for one for the past years, right?" The man looked up, as if he has struck gold, his face beamed and looked directly at the drunken girl. He replied, "Yes......you are right! I haven't been looking for anyone for the past years."
With that, the man darted across the floor and out the door, leaving the lady in much bewilderment. He finally realized that he has already found his dream girl, and she was.....the Vancouver girl all along! The drunken lady has said something that awoken him.All along he has found his girl. That was why he did not bother to look further when he realized she was not coming back. It was not any specific girl he was seeking! It was perfection that he wanted, and yes.....perfection!!
Relationship is something both parties should work on. Realizing that he had let away someone so important in his life, he decided to call her immediately. His whole mind was flooded with fear. He was afraid that she might have found someone new or no longer had the same feelings anymore..... For once, he felt the fear of losing someone.As it was Christmas eve, the line was quite hard to get through, especially an overseas call. He tried again and again, never giving up. Finally, he got through......precisely at 1200 midnight. He confessed his love for her and the girl was moved to tears. It seemed that she never got over him! Even after so long, she was still waiting for him, never giving up.
He was so excited to meet her and to begin his new chapter of their lives. He decided to fly to Vancouver to join her. It was the happiest time of their lives! But their happy time was short-lived. Two days before he was supposed to fly to Vancouver, he received a call from her father. She had a head-on car collision with a drunken driver. She passed away after 6 hours in a coma.
The guy was devastated, as it was a complete loss. Why did fate played such cruel games with him? He cursed the heaven for taking her away from him, denying even one last look at her! How cruel he cursed! How he damned the Gods...!! How he hated himself....for taking so long to realize his mistake!! That was in 1996.
The moral of this story is :
Treasure what you have...
Time is too slow for those who wait;
Too swift for those who fear;
Too long for those who grief;
Too short for those who rejoice;
But for those who love...
Time is Eternity.
She was slightly tipsy..... must be from the whiskey on her hand. She continued,
"Why...? Don't you need someone to pose as your girlfriend this year?" Then he answered, "No, there is no need for that anymore......"
Before he can continue, he was interrupted, "Oh yes! Must have found a girlfriend! You haven't been searching for one for the past years, right?" The man looked up, as if he has struck gold, his face beamed and looked directly at the drunken girl. He replied, "Yes......you are right! I haven't been looking for anyone for the past years."
With that, the man darted across the floor and out the door, leaving the lady in much bewilderment. He finally realized that he has already found his dream girl, and she was.....the Vancouver girl all along! The drunken lady has said something that awoken him.All along he has found his girl. That was why he did not bother to look further when he realized she was not coming back. It was not any specific girl he was seeking! It was perfection that he wanted, and yes.....perfection!!
Relationship is something both parties should work on. Realizing that he had let away someone so important in his life, he decided to call her immediately. His whole mind was flooded with fear. He was afraid that she might have found someone new or no longer had the same feelings anymore..... For once, he felt the fear of losing someone.As it was Christmas eve, the line was quite hard to get through, especially an overseas call. He tried again and again, never giving up. Finally, he got through......precisely at 1200 midnight. He confessed his love for her and the girl was moved to tears. It seemed that she never got over him! Even after so long, she was still waiting for him, never giving up.
He was so excited to meet her and to begin his new chapter of their lives. He decided to fly to Vancouver to join her. It was the happiest time of their lives! But their happy time was short-lived. Two days before he was supposed to fly to Vancouver, he received a call from her father. She had a head-on car collision with a drunken driver. She passed away after 6 hours in a coma.
The guy was devastated, as it was a complete loss. Why did fate played such cruel games with him? He cursed the heaven for taking her away from him, denying even one last look at her! How cruel he cursed! How he damned the Gods...!! How he hated himself....for taking so long to realize his mistake!! That was in 1996.
The moral of this story is :
Treasure what you have...
Time is too slow for those who wait;
Too swift for those who fear;
Too long for those who grief;
Too short for those who rejoice;
But for those who love...
Time is Eternity.
For all you out there with someone special in your heart, cherish that person, cherish every moment that you spend together that special someone, for in life, anything can happen anytime. You may painfully regret, only to realise that it is too late.
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The Story of Danielle and Roger
True Falling in Love Story
The story of Danielle & Roger
Danielle, Roger & Molly Blue
After having my daughter, I was living with my parents as a single mother and working two jobs trying to save up and get an apartment for us. I worked days as a housekeeper at one hotel and nights as a night auditor in another hotel, trying to squeeze time with my daughter and sleep in between. My life was a busy shuffle.
I tried to date, but it was really hard to fit the time in. I fell hard for the first guy I dated after becoming a mother, but he ultimately broke my heart. It was around this time that I met Roger, the new, tall, brown-eyed breakfast waiter in the hotel's restaurant. He introduced himself the first time he stopped by the front desk. I recall noticing he was attractive and friendly, but I was still jaded from the very recent breakup and just didn't pay much attention to him flirting with me.
One night he was working the night shift for a change, and I had just begun my graveyard shift. He left his deposit and also his phone number, along with his AIM screenname written down on a piece of paper. I tucked it away out of politeness, but didn't call him.
Then another night he requested me as a friend on Myspace and I still didn't think much of it at the time. I looked through his photos on his page and I did think he was very cute, but I just didn't feel right dating anyone, even someone as cute as him.
Plus, he didn't know I have a daughter and I was certain it would taint his view of me. It's not that I was embarrassed about having a baby, because I love my little girl with my very heart and soul, but i was afraid that she would scare off any guy who ever showed interest in me. Part of this was due to the fact that this had contributed to the prior relationship falling apart: that guy had no interest in having a baby in his life and she and I are a package deal.
Roger sent me a message on Myspace (I had never given him my number), and asked me to come hang out sometime. I never responded because I was scared to tell him about my daughter or crush him by telling him I just wasn't ready. Not knowing what to say, I said nothing.
So a year went by, Roger was just this attractive guy that I now felt embarrassed for having turned down. I saw him in various random places around town like the grocery store, the movie rental place, the gas station. We'd always say Hi and chat for a minute and every time I wanted to say something significant, ask him out or have him ask me out, but I chickened out every time. I should also mention I never happened to see him when I had my daughter with me, it was always times when I was out running errands without her.
I started dating a guy who lived an hour away, just sort of fell into that relationship. He would come down on the weekends and yet I wasn't really falling in love with him. It was one of those whatever relationships that's hardly worth mentioning. One night I was at the movie rental place, that boyfriend was outside in the car and I bumped into Roger in line while I returned a movie. We started talking and he asked me out again. Once again I turned him down, only because my boyfriend was outside in the car. I remember how hurt he looked to be making yet another pass and me just acting completely disinterested.
I got in the car and felt kinda bummed about the whole experience. I could see he was really pursuing me, and I was looking like a jerk.
Then, that whatever boyfriend cheated on me 2 months later and broke my heart.
During this time, I discovered that Roger had moved in with my previous ex, the first one I dated after having my daughter. What a pairing I thought. Now, Roger was living with my ex and I knew my ex would talk about me. It bothered me to wonder what Roger thought of me.
So I picked myself and IMed him one night, we struck up a casual conversation and I got around to mentioning him asking me out in the past. I then asked if he'd like to meet up and hang out sometime. He informed me that he now had a girlfriend. I felt a sense of utter frustration and disappointment. I knew I'd missed my chance and I couldn't stop kicking myself.
This went on for months. I would see him out with the girlfriend and every single time I knew I was a fool. I knew he was a catch, but I had been so busy getting over a guy and being ashamed to date as a single mother that I'd let this amazing guy slip past me.
Then came Christmas. It came and went, another lonely one for me. And then I got an IM, from Roger.
He asked if I'd like to meet up, saying he had broken up with his girlfriend and he wanted to see me.
Now was my chance. At this time, my daughter was 2 and a half and 2 years had gone by since we had met. The very first time we hung out, it was at his apartment that he shared with a roommate and a cat.
From the moment I first set foot in that place, I felt at home and I felt like I belonged with this man. Our first dinner together, our first movie on his tv, our first kiss, it all felt the perfect fit in every way. I week later he met my daughter, which he already knew about (silly me didn't consider my OWN photos on Myspace).2 weeks later we told each other we loved each other.
Almost two years later, he, my daughter and I are a happy little family. I feel deep down that he is the man that my daughter and I supposed to be with and that maybe it was our destiny to get together at a certain time and not a moment sooner.
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Alternative Love Story
I was a senior in high school. I was bi-sexual and very lonely. I felt like I was the only person in the world that was like me (bi). I did not have many friends, as I am not really the type of person that people think of as a best friend. I was not very often invited to do things.
I was so lonely and in a dark place. Finally, I went online to a chatroom for gay teens. After much searching, I was messaged by this guy. We began talking, and quickly realized that we have an incredible amount of similarities. We were the same sexually, and we were both lonely and looking for a friend. We were both from the same state, and we had the same interests and hobbies. We exchanged phone numbers, and began texting. We would text for hours and hours every day.
We began noticing that we are essentially the same person. He was the same as I was with friends, in that neither of us have a best friend. We had all of the same likes, dislikes, pet peeves. Our minds were the same, we thought the same on things, and we had all of the same opinions. We became very good friends. We realized that we were each other's best friend.
Neither of us had ever had such a mutual best friendship. We told each other everything. We had no secrets, and we were happy. We were both truly happy for the first time in either of our lives. We gave each other advice, and we were always there for one another. We were to each other what neither of us had in our lives in our towns, a true caring friend. We began talking on the phone, and we would literally talk for hours at night.
We even talked for five hours once. Even our parents and friends noticed that both of us seemed different. My parents asked me if something had happened to make me so happy. My friends told me I was a lot more fun to be around now then I used to be. His friends said similar things to him. We helped each other come out of our sad "shell." Naturally, we began to fall in love. We cared about each other so much that the love just developed, even though we didn't mean it to. We finally told each other we loved each other, and we both felt the same and were happy. As the months passed, we just got closer and closer. Our love just got stronger. He was mine, I was his.
Eventually, we met during the summer. I drove down to his town to spend time with him. We just went to the mall, and walked around and talked and laughed and hugged, and it was really the best day of both our lives. After we went to dinner, we got in my car to listen to music and talk. We started hugging, and just held each other. After saying sweet things to each other, and hugging, I kissed him on the cheek. I asked if that was okay, for which he said yes and kissed me on the cheek back. We kissed on the lips, and started making out. We went on with that for a long time, and we went quite a bit further, if you know what I mean. This was the first time for both of us. We went our separate ways that day, completely happy and content. After that, our love just got stronger. It was love, true true love. We continued to talk and text constantly throughout the summer.
Both of us had prayed for a friend that was like us, someone who understands us, and our prayers were answered. I was content with my life, and he was content with his. Towards the end of the summer, he told me he was afraid that when I leave for college, I am going to forget about him. I quickly told him that would never happen, and that I would always love him and be there for him. I went down to see him again before I left for school.
We hugged and kissed, and sucked, and just held each other. Once when we were making out, I pulled back, put my forehead against his, and said, "Promise me you will not leave me. I care about you, and I need you, and I love you, so so much." He smiled, kissed me, and said, "I promise promise that I will never leave you. I am always going to be there for you." So we left that day, again completely satisfied with our lives, and loving the other. We decided to not take the title of boyfriend and boyfriend, simply because we decided that boyfriends can break up, but best friends cannot.
So I went off to college, and we continued to be there for each other, and he helped me through the difficulty of leaving home. I began to acclimate to college life, but the sole reason that I acclimated well was because I had him there to love me and help me. After several months in college, I began to notice a change in him. He began texting me less, and it had been a while since we had talked on the phone.
I questioned him of this, fearing that I had made him mad, and he simply said he was sorry and that he was busy with his sports and his school work, and his actual work. I accepted this and just did the best I could to talk as often as we could. But then the gap seemed to widen. He began not always answering my texts, and he never texted me first. Even when we would talk, he seemed more distant and uncaring.
This was not the same loving caring sweet person that I was so used to. I began to fall apart mentally and I finally asked him what was wrong and what I had done. He told me via text message that he didn't love me anymore. He also said that I annoy him with all of the texts. A pain rushed over me unlike something I have ever felt before. I cried, I cried more then I have ever cried in my life. He doesn't love me anymore! I don't know what I have done wrong. I am heartbroken. I need him, and I literally fall apart. I cannot stop crying.
I could't even hold myself together during class, and would have to deal with awkward stared from people as I cried. I love him still so much, but he doesn't love me. I get on Facebook several days later, and I see that he is now in a relationship with some girl! He didn't even tell me. I was broken, and still am broken.
I started seeing a clinical psychiatrist, to try and keep myself from sinking into depression, or worse. Everyday, I wonder how he is doing. How his life is, if he is happy and doing well. I always wanted him to be happy. I ask myself what I did wrong, but I never find the answer. Not only did I loose my first and only best friend, but I lost the person I love deeply.
I loose sight of what it feels like to be happy. I still think the world of him, and I still do not go a day without sobbing at least a little bit. I try to at least think about how happy I used to be. I try to appreciate him for showing me what true happiness feels like. I still love him, and I think I always will.
He made me promise once that I would always be his. I made him promise that he would always love me, and he would always be mine. I am going to always keep my promise, as long as I live, even though he didn't.
I will always love you, Nick.
______________________________________________
The Story of Danielle and Roger
True Falling in Love Story
The story of Danielle & Roger
Danielle, Roger & Molly Blue
After having my daughter, I was living with my parents as a single mother and working two jobs trying to save up and get an apartment for us. I worked days as a housekeeper at one hotel and nights as a night auditor in another hotel, trying to squeeze time with my daughter and sleep in between. My life was a busy shuffle.
I tried to date, but it was really hard to fit the time in. I fell hard for the first guy I dated after becoming a mother, but he ultimately broke my heart. It was around this time that I met Roger, the new, tall, brown-eyed breakfast waiter in the hotel's restaurant. He introduced himself the first time he stopped by the front desk. I recall noticing he was attractive and friendly, but I was still jaded from the very recent breakup and just didn't pay much attention to him flirting with me.
One night he was working the night shift for a change, and I had just begun my graveyard shift. He left his deposit and also his phone number, along with his AIM screenname written down on a piece of paper. I tucked it away out of politeness, but didn't call him.
Then another night he requested me as a friend on Myspace and I still didn't think much of it at the time. I looked through his photos on his page and I did think he was very cute, but I just didn't feel right dating anyone, even someone as cute as him.
Plus, he didn't know I have a daughter and I was certain it would taint his view of me. It's not that I was embarrassed about having a baby, because I love my little girl with my very heart and soul, but i was afraid that she would scare off any guy who ever showed interest in me. Part of this was due to the fact that this had contributed to the prior relationship falling apart: that guy had no interest in having a baby in his life and she and I are a package deal.
Roger sent me a message on Myspace (I had never given him my number), and asked me to come hang out sometime. I never responded because I was scared to tell him about my daughter or crush him by telling him I just wasn't ready. Not knowing what to say, I said nothing.
So a year went by, Roger was just this attractive guy that I now felt embarrassed for having turned down. I saw him in various random places around town like the grocery store, the movie rental place, the gas station. We'd always say Hi and chat for a minute and every time I wanted to say something significant, ask him out or have him ask me out, but I chickened out every time. I should also mention I never happened to see him when I had my daughter with me, it was always times when I was out running errands without her.
I started dating a guy who lived an hour away, just sort of fell into that relationship. He would come down on the weekends and yet I wasn't really falling in love with him. It was one of those whatever relationships that's hardly worth mentioning. One night I was at the movie rental place, that boyfriend was outside in the car and I bumped into Roger in line while I returned a movie. We started talking and he asked me out again. Once again I turned him down, only because my boyfriend was outside in the car. I remember how hurt he looked to be making yet another pass and me just acting completely disinterested.
I got in the car and felt kinda bummed about the whole experience. I could see he was really pursuing me, and I was looking like a jerk.
Then, that whatever boyfriend cheated on me 2 months later and broke my heart.
During this time, I discovered that Roger had moved in with my previous ex, the first one I dated after having my daughter. What a pairing I thought. Now, Roger was living with my ex and I knew my ex would talk about me. It bothered me to wonder what Roger thought of me.
So I picked myself and IMed him one night, we struck up a casual conversation and I got around to mentioning him asking me out in the past. I then asked if he'd like to meet up and hang out sometime. He informed me that he now had a girlfriend. I felt a sense of utter frustration and disappointment. I knew I'd missed my chance and I couldn't stop kicking myself.
This went on for months. I would see him out with the girlfriend and every single time I knew I was a fool. I knew he was a catch, but I had been so busy getting over a guy and being ashamed to date as a single mother that I'd let this amazing guy slip past me.
Then came Christmas. It came and went, another lonely one for me. And then I got an IM, from Roger.
He asked if I'd like to meet up, saying he had broken up with his girlfriend and he wanted to see me.
Now was my chance. At this time, my daughter was 2 and a half and 2 years had gone by since we had met. The very first time we hung out, it was at his apartment that he shared with a roommate and a cat.
From the moment I first set foot in that place, I felt at home and I felt like I belonged with this man. Our first dinner together, our first movie on his tv, our first kiss, it all felt the perfect fit in every way. I week later he met my daughter, which he already knew about (silly me didn't consider my OWN photos on Myspace).2 weeks later we told each other we loved each other.
Almost two years later, he, my daughter and I are a happy little family. I feel deep down that he is the man that my daughter and I supposed to be with and that maybe it was our destiny to get together at a certain time and not a moment sooner.
_______________________________________________________
Alternative Love Story
I was a senior in high school. I was bi-sexual and very lonely. I felt like I was the only person in the world that was like me (bi). I did not have many friends, as I am not really the type of person that people think of as a best friend. I was not very often invited to do things.
I was so lonely and in a dark place. Finally, I went online to a chatroom for gay teens. After much searching, I was messaged by this guy. We began talking, and quickly realized that we have an incredible amount of similarities. We were the same sexually, and we were both lonely and looking for a friend. We were both from the same state, and we had the same interests and hobbies. We exchanged phone numbers, and began texting. We would text for hours and hours every day.
We began noticing that we are essentially the same person. He was the same as I was with friends, in that neither of us have a best friend. We had all of the same likes, dislikes, pet peeves. Our minds were the same, we thought the same on things, and we had all of the same opinions. We became very good friends. We realized that we were each other's best friend.
Neither of us had ever had such a mutual best friendship. We told each other everything. We had no secrets, and we were happy. We were both truly happy for the first time in either of our lives. We gave each other advice, and we were always there for one another. We were to each other what neither of us had in our lives in our towns, a true caring friend. We began talking on the phone, and we would literally talk for hours at night.
We even talked for five hours once. Even our parents and friends noticed that both of us seemed different. My parents asked me if something had happened to make me so happy. My friends told me I was a lot more fun to be around now then I used to be. His friends said similar things to him. We helped each other come out of our sad "shell." Naturally, we began to fall in love. We cared about each other so much that the love just developed, even though we didn't mean it to. We finally told each other we loved each other, and we both felt the same and were happy. As the months passed, we just got closer and closer. Our love just got stronger. He was mine, I was his.
Eventually, we met during the summer. I drove down to his town to spend time with him. We just went to the mall, and walked around and talked and laughed and hugged, and it was really the best day of both our lives. After we went to dinner, we got in my car to listen to music and talk. We started hugging, and just held each other. After saying sweet things to each other, and hugging, I kissed him on the cheek. I asked if that was okay, for which he said yes and kissed me on the cheek back. We kissed on the lips, and started making out. We went on with that for a long time, and we went quite a bit further, if you know what I mean. This was the first time for both of us. We went our separate ways that day, completely happy and content. After that, our love just got stronger. It was love, true true love. We continued to talk and text constantly throughout the summer.
Both of us had prayed for a friend that was like us, someone who understands us, and our prayers were answered. I was content with my life, and he was content with his. Towards the end of the summer, he told me he was afraid that when I leave for college, I am going to forget about him. I quickly told him that would never happen, and that I would always love him and be there for him. I went down to see him again before I left for school.
We hugged and kissed, and sucked, and just held each other. Once when we were making out, I pulled back, put my forehead against his, and said, "Promise me you will not leave me. I care about you, and I need you, and I love you, so so much." He smiled, kissed me, and said, "I promise promise that I will never leave you. I am always going to be there for you." So we left that day, again completely satisfied with our lives, and loving the other. We decided to not take the title of boyfriend and boyfriend, simply because we decided that boyfriends can break up, but best friends cannot.
So I went off to college, and we continued to be there for each other, and he helped me through the difficulty of leaving home. I began to acclimate to college life, but the sole reason that I acclimated well was because I had him there to love me and help me. After several months in college, I began to notice a change in him. He began texting me less, and it had been a while since we had talked on the phone.
I questioned him of this, fearing that I had made him mad, and he simply said he was sorry and that he was busy with his sports and his school work, and his actual work. I accepted this and just did the best I could to talk as often as we could. But then the gap seemed to widen. He began not always answering my texts, and he never texted me first. Even when we would talk, he seemed more distant and uncaring.
This was not the same loving caring sweet person that I was so used to. I began to fall apart mentally and I finally asked him what was wrong and what I had done. He told me via text message that he didn't love me anymore. He also said that I annoy him with all of the texts. A pain rushed over me unlike something I have ever felt before. I cried, I cried more then I have ever cried in my life. He doesn't love me anymore! I don't know what I have done wrong. I am heartbroken. I need him, and I literally fall apart. I cannot stop crying.
I could't even hold myself together during class, and would have to deal with awkward stared from people as I cried. I love him still so much, but he doesn't love me. I get on Facebook several days later, and I see that he is now in a relationship with some girl! He didn't even tell me. I was broken, and still am broken.
I started seeing a clinical psychiatrist, to try and keep myself from sinking into depression, or worse. Everyday, I wonder how he is doing. How his life is, if he is happy and doing well. I always wanted him to be happy. I ask myself what I did wrong, but I never find the answer. Not only did I loose my first and only best friend, but I lost the person I love deeply.
I loose sight of what it feels like to be happy. I still think the world of him, and I still do not go a day without sobbing at least a little bit. I try to at least think about how happy I used to be. I try to appreciate him for showing me what true happiness feels like. I still love him, and I think I always will.
He made me promise once that I would always be his. I made him promise that he would always love me, and he would always be mine. I am going to always keep my promise, as long as I live, even though he didn't.
I will always love you, Nick.
______________________________________________
A Sad Love Story
If this doesn't touch you ..... get a heart!
One night a guy and girl were driving home from the movies. The boy sensed there was something wrong because of the painful silence they shared between them that night. The girl then asked the boy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed and that it was time to move on.
A silent tear slid down his cheek as he slowly reached into his pocket and passed her a folded note. At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. He swerved right into the drivers seat, killing the boy.
Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she pulled it out and read it.
" Without your love, I would die."
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A Couple's Heartbreak
A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the apple of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for work so he asked the wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. The mother, preoccupied in the kitchen, totally forgot the matter.
The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle and, fascinated with its color, drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed, the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned. She was terrified how to face her husband.
When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just four words.
What do you think were the four words?
The husband just said "I Love You Darling"
The husband's totally unexpected reaction is proactive behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life. There is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he have taken time to keep the bottle away, this will not have happened. No
point in attaching blame. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her.
Sometimes we spend time asking who is responsible or who to blame, whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. We miss out some warmth in human relationship in giving each other support. After all, shouldn't forgiving someone we love be the easiest thing in the world to do? Treasure what you have. Don't multiply pain, anguish and suffering by holding on to forgiveness.
If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would be much fewer problems in the world.
Take off all your envies, jealousies, unwillingness to forgive, selfishness, and fears and you will find things are actually not as difficult as you think.
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Dream MateYears ago I asked God to send me a wife, for the Bible says “you have not because you ask not“. I told the Lord not just that I wanted a wife but even explained to him the kind of wife I was looking for.
I told him I wanted someone who is kind, tender, gentle, compassionate, loving, sincere, peaceful, generous, affectionate, understanding, passionate, warm, intelligent, humorous, sensual, and trustful. I even mentioned things I wanted her to be physically. And as time passed, I would add more things to this list of my heart desire for a wife.
Then one night in prayer God spoke to my heart and said... “Son I can not give you what you've asked me for.“ I said, “Why not Lord?“ He replied, “For I am a just God and a God of righteousness and all I do is just and right.“ I said, “Lord, I don't understand why I cannot have what I have asked you for.“
He replied, “Then I will explain. It would not be just and right for me to grant to you your wish for I cannot give unto you something that you are not yourself. It would not be fair for me to grant unto you a person that is loving if you can sometimes be hateful, or someone that is kind if you can also be mean, someone that is a forgiver and yet you can still carry a grudge, someone that is sensitive and you are yet so insensitive... etc.
He said unto me, “Instead of wasting time trying to find someone or hoping that I will give you someone with all these qualities you seek, you should rather allow me to take this time to allow you to become all it is that you are looking for. For I cannot give to you that which you are not.“
“And if you allow me to work up on your spirit and to shape and mold your heart as I choose then when you see the one I have for you, you will be able to say like Adam said... “She is bone of my bone and she is flesh of my flesh“ for you will see yourself in her for you both will be one flesh.“
Keep this in mind.
This is for all:
the recently married;
the ones who have been married;
the soon to get married;
and the ones that are still looking.
God made woman from man's rib --
not from his head to top him,
nor from his feet to be walked upon;
but from his side to be his partner in life,
from under his arm to be protected by him,
and from near his heart to be loved by him.
Whether or not you believe in God, much of the above still applies.
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A Sad & True Love Story
It all started when I was 6 years old. While I was playing outside on my farm in California, I met a boy. He was an average kind of boy who teased you and then you chased them and beat them up. After that first meeting in which I beat him up we kept on meeting and beating each other up at the fence. That only lasted for a little while though. We would meet at the fence all the time and we were always together. I would tell him all my secrets. He was quite very quiet he would just listen to what I had to say. I found him easy to talk to and I could talk to him about everything. In school we had separate friends but when we got home we would always talk about what happened in school. One day I said to him that a guy I liked hurt me and broke my heart. He just comforted me and said everything would be okay. He gave me words of encouragement and helped me get over him. I was happy and thought of him as a real friend. But I knew that there was something else about him that I liked. I thought of it that night and figured it was just a friend kinda thing that I was feeling. All through high school and even through graduation we're always together and of course I thought of it as being friends. But I knew deep inside that I really felt differently. On graduation night even though we had different dates to the prom I wanted to be with him. That night after everybody went home I went to his house and wanted to tell him that I wanted to see him. Well, that night was my big chance and all I did was just sit there with him watching the stars and talking about what I was going to do and what he was going to do. I looked into his eyes and listened to him talk about what his dream was. How he wanted to get married and settle down. He said how he wanted to be rich and successful. All I could do was to tell him my dream and cuddle next to him. I went home hurting because I didn't tell him how I was feeling.
I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him but I was too scared and frightened. I let my feelings go and told myself that someday I would tell him just how I felt. All through college I wanted to tell him but he always had someone with him. After graduation he got a job in New York, I was happy for him but at the same time I was sad to see him go. I was sad also because I didn't tell him how I felt. But I couldn't let him know now that he was leaving for his big job. So I just kept it to myself and watched him go on the plane. I cried as I hugged him for what I felt was going to be the last time. I went home that night and cried my eyes out. I felt hurt that I didn't tell him what I had inside my heart. Well, I got a job as a secretary and then worked my way to a computer analyst. I was proud of what I had accomplished. One day I got a letter with an invitation to a marriage. It was from him, I was happy and sad at the same time. Now I know that I could never be with him and that we could only be friends. I went to the wedding the next month. It was a big occasion. The big church wedding and the reception at the hotel. I met the bride and of course him. I fell in love one more time. But I held back so it wouldn't spoil what should be the happiest day in his life. I tried to have fun that night but it was killing me inside watching him being so happy and me trying to be happy covering up my sadness tears inside of me. I left New York feeling that I did the right thing. Before I left on the flight, he came running out of nowhere and said his good-byes and how he was very happy to see me. I came home and just tried to forget about what went on in New York. I had to go on with my life. As the years went on, we wrote to each other on what was going on and how he had missed talking to me. On one occasion he never wrote back to me at all. I was getting worried as to why he hadn't written anything for a long time after I had already written 6 letters to him. Well, just when everything seemed hopeless and sad in my life, I got a note that said: "meet me at the fence where we used to talk about things". I went and saw him there. I was happy to see him, but he was broken-hearted and sad inside. We hugged until we couldn't breathe anymore. Then he told me about the divorce and why he hadn't written for a long time. He cried until he couldn't cry anymore. Finally, we went back to the house and talked and laughed about what I had been going and to catch up on old times. But in all of this, I couldn't tell him how I felt about him. In the days that followed, he had fun and forgot about all his problem and his divorce. I fell in love again with him. When it came time for him to leave back to New York, I went to see him off and cried. I hated to see him leave. He promised to see me every time he could get a vacation. I couldn't wait for him to come so I could be with him. We would always have fun when we were together. One day he didn't show up like he said he would. I figured that he might have been busy. The days turned into months and I just forgot about it. Then I got a call one day from a lawyer in New York. The lawyer said that he had died in a car accident going to the airport. And that it took this long till everything was settled. It broke my heart. I was shocked about what took place. Now I knew why he didn't come that day. Again, I was broken-hearted. I cried that night, cried tears of sadness and heartache. Asking questions why did this happen to a kind guy like him? I gathered my things and went to New York for the reading of his will.
Of course, things were given to his family and his ex-wife. I finally got to meet her since the last time we met at the wedding. She explained to me how he was and how he always provided. But he was always unhappy. She would always try everything but she couldn't get him happy, as he was that night at their wedding. When the will was read, the one thing that was given to me was a diary. It was a dairy that of his life. I cried as it was given to me... As I flew on the plane I remembered the good times that we had together. I started reading the diary and what was written. The diary was started with the day we first met. I read on till I started to cry. The diary told of him saying that he had fallen in love with me that day I was broken-hearted. But he was too afraid to tell me what he had felt. That is why he was so quiet and liked to listen to me. It told of how he wanted to tell me so many times, but was too afraid to say anything. It told of when he went to New York and fell in love with another. How the happiest time he had was seeing me and dancing with me at the wedding. He said he imagined it was our wedding. How he was always unhappy till he had no choice but to divorce his wife. How the best time in his life was to read the letters written to him by me. Finally, the diary ended when it said, "today I will tell her I love her". It was the day he was killed. The day I was going to finally find out what was really in his heart.
If you love someone, don't wait till tomorrow to tell him/her. Maybe that next day will never come at all
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Love Story With Sad Ending
one day I was walking down the street when a gorgeous man approached me and asked me for my number. So I said yeah and gave it to him. he called me that night and we talked for hours. he told me how beautiful I was and he wanted to get to know me. so he took me out two days later and we had a wonderful night. I never felt that way about anyone before. I felt that feeling. that feeling you get when you have butterflies in your stomach and its like they almost hurt. so we went out on a couple more dates before we decided to make it official. about a year and a half later I got pregnant and before I even told him he proposed. I was going to tell him that night. it was so weird. from that night on I knew it was definitely meant to be. After I had the baby and lost all that weight we got married. we had a huge wedding and went on a wonderful honey moon in Paris. somewhere I always wanted to go. one night, on our daughters first birthday, he went out on a cold stormy night to buy our baby girl a cake. he was gone for an hour before I started to worry. I called his phone at least a hundred times in a row. he never came home that night. my daughters first b day was all messed up cause she wanted her daddy and I got no sleep. I started to assume he was cheating. I cried the whole night long. the police arrived at my house at exactly 6:36 in the morning and told me my husband got in a car crash and died. I had so much running through my head. I was in denial but how was I going to tell my baby her daddy died? and how was I going to deal with it? I felt as if my life was over. I thought about committing suicide but I didn't want my daughter to grow up with no mother or father. now its three years later and nobody else has came into my life. I don't want anyone else. all I want is for him to walk through that door with my daughters cake and tell me he loves me once more. and for us to celebrate sabrinas bday all night long. and for us to open presents and take pictures like he had planned. but I know its impossible for my wish to come true. but I love you Mike and I always will. me and Sabrina miss you deeply.
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Sad Love Story
It had been raining for more than a week, so much rain it made everyday seemed so restless and gloomy. She called and said she was coming up. It was the third time she came up to see me that week. I carried her excuse of why she came all the way here and went to meet her at the nearby seven-eleven. She was standing there alone, carrying her red umbrella. Her friend had dropped her off. It was raining and she was shivering. She looked weak and fragile in the harsh rain, wearing not enough to keep her warm.
I walked up to her and said, "You shouldn't come see me anymore," and stuff like how we shouldn't be together.
She said, "I miss you."
I told her coldly, "Lets go, I'll take you home."
She did not open up her umbrella, I knew she wanted to share mine.
I said, "Open up your umbrella, let's go."
Unwillingly, She opened up her umbrella and walked with me to the car. She said she hadn't eaten lunch or dinner and asked if we could stop at some place to eat.
Right away I answered with a stoned heart, "No!"
Disappointed, she asked me to take her to the train station, she said she would take the train back home.
Maybe it was the rain, all the trains were full of people with umbrellas and suit cases who were eager to get home, not caring about who just passed by. We waited and waited, she looked at me innocently. Being together for so long, of course I knew what she meant. I understand how she must feel when she came all this way here in this kind of weather and I treat her like this. With her soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and wanted to let her stay for the night.
But reality struck again, I said to her coldly, "Let's go try the other train station."
We were living in the same apartment building, on the same floor. Back then there were four of us, and we got along well. We would always eat dinner together, watch movies, and sometimes go camping. We were more like a family, but I didn't know I would end up falling in love with the only girl of the four. Maybe it was during the last year of college, having lived together for two years, we developed deep feelings for each other. After she graduated she went back home, and I stayed for one more year to finish school. During that year I was only able to take the train down to see her on holidays, but never for long. That was how we kept the treasured relationship.
We were walking along the side of the road. She was in front of me and I was right behind her. Her umbrella had a broken spoke. She looked liked a wounded soldier, carrying her rusted rifle walking weakly. Many times, she was too into thinking or whatever she was doing, drifting off the road, she almost got hit by the cars passing by. I wanted to just take her in my arms, but with the love I had for her and the constant pain in my stomach, I did nothing. On the way, we passed by the park where we use to always go.
She begged and said, "Lets go in the park just for a little while please, I promise I'll go home right after this."
With her begging, my cold heart softened, but I still put up an annoyed face and walked in the park. I was just sitting on the benches looking like I wanted to leave. She went to the big oak tree and she was looking for something. I knew she was looking for what we wrote on that tree with a silver ink pen half a year ago. If I remember it right, it said, "Chris and Susan was here, Chris had tea and Susan was drinking hot chocolate. Hope Chris and Susan would always remember this day, always loving each other, forever." She was looking around for quite a while, then she came back slowly with tears on her face.
She said, "Chris, I can't find it, it's not there anymore."
I felt so sour inside, there was a stream of pain, flowing into my heart, the kind of pain I've never felt before. But all I could do was pretend I didn't care, and said, "Can we go now?"
I opened up my big black umbrella, she was just standing there, didn't want to leave yet, hoping there was still a chance. She said, "You made up the story of you and that other girl didn't you? I know I frustrate you sometimes, but I'll change, can't we start over?"
I didn't say a word, just looked down and shook my head. After that we just kept on walking towards the train station, didn't say a word to each other.
Four years ago, the doctor said I had cancer, but it was found early, so it was still curable. Thinking that it was okay, I started living my normal life again, and even forgot about the cancer. I didn't think about the cancer again and did not go back to the doctor. Until a month ago, my stomach was hurting for two weeks straight, and the nightmare awakened me again. First I thought the pain would go away, but it grew stronger until to the point that I couldn't take it anymore. I went back to the doctor and took an X-ray. The picture came out and there was a big black spot, which proved the truth that I did not want to believe. I was at the most glittering part of my life, but it was coming to an end. I wanted myself and the people around me to go through the least pain possible, so I decided to commit suicide. But I couldn't let people find out about my intentions, especially Susan, the person I love the most in this whole world, who still doesn't know about the truth. Susan was still young, she shouldn't have to go through this. So I made up some stories and lied to her. It was a cruel thing to do, and it broke her heart, but it was the fastest way to wipe out three years feelings. I didn't have much time, because I would soon start to loose hair and she would find out eventually. But now I'm close to succeeding, this drama would soon be over. Thirty minutes more this would all come to an end, that was what I had in mind.
The train had stopped running so I called a taxi for her. We were just standing there, waiting, loosing our last moments in silence.
I saw the taxi from far away, I held my tears and said to her, "Take care of yourself, take good care of yourself."
She didn't talk, just nodded lightly, and then opened up her misshaped umbrella and stepped out on the street. Out in the rain, we became two single life forms, one red, one black, so far away from each other. I opened the door for her and she got in, then I close the gate that would separate me from her forever. I stood by the car, staring in the dark window, at the first love in my life, also the last one, walking out of my life. The car started, driving into the street. Finally I couldn't hold my sorrow and the twist in my heart any longer, waving my arms rapidly chasing after the taxi, because I knew, this would be the last time I see her. I wanted to tell her I still love her, I wanted to tell her to stay, I wanted to tell her so much, but the taxi had already turned in the corner. Warm tears kept falling down my face, blended with the cold rain drops. I was cold, not because of the rain. I was cold inside.
She left, and I didn't get anymore of her phone calls even until today. I know she didn't see my tears, because they were washed away by the rain. I left without regrets. But I'm not Chris, I'm that girl Susan, using my memory, and his diary I found after one year since he left, writing down these last words.
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A Girl Who Felt Ignored
This story is about a girl who felt ignored..
This story is about a girl who felt ignored..
I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin.
I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club, I found out that I fell in love with him.
Before the trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him.
And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways.
I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there was so many other girls.
To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl...
"Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?" I asked.
"I can't"
"Why? You need to study at home?" I felt disappointment grabbing me.
"No... I am going to meet a friend..."
He was always like that.
He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing.
To him, I was just a girlfriend.
The word 'love' only came out of my mouth.
Since I knew him, I had never heard I'm say 'I love you' before.
To us, there weren't any anniversaries at all.
He didn't say anything from the first day and it continued till 1O0 days...2O0 days...
Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don't know why...
Then one day...
Me: Um, Jin, I...
Jin: What...don't drag, just say...
Me: I love you.
Jin: ...........you.....um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my 'three words' and handed me the doll.
Then he disappeared, like he was running away.
The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one.
There were many....
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday.
When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call.
But... lunch passed, dinner passed...and soon the sky was dark... he still didn't call.
It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore.
2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep.
He told me to come out of the house.
Still. I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin...
Jin: Here...take this...
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What's this?
Jin: I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now.
I'm going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday.
He turned around and walked away like nothing had happened.
Then I shouted...
"Wait..."
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me...
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung onto him.
But he just said simple cold words and left.
"I don't want to say...that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else."
That was what he said. Then ran off...
My legs felt numb...and I collapsed to the ground. He didn't want to say it easily...
How could he...
I felt that...
Maybe he is not the right guy for me...
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying.
He didn't call me, although I was waiting.
He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house.
That's how those dolls piled up in my room... everyday
After a month, I got myself together and went to school.
But what made the pain resurface was that.... I saw him on a street...with another girl...
He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me...as he touched the doll...
I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell...
Why did he gave these to me...
Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls...
In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around.
Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him.
He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house.
I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop.
I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that....its going to end.
Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.
Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn't help hating him, acting like nothing had happened and joking around.
Soon, he held out the doll as usual...
Me: I don't need it.
Jin: What....why...
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don't need this doll, I don't need it anymore!! I don't want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes were very shaky.
"I'm sorry" He apologized in a tiny voice.
He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll...
"You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!"
But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll.
Then...
Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
"Jin! Move! Move away!" I shouted...
But he didn't hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
"Jin, move!"
HONK~!!!
"Boom!" That sound, so terrifying.
That's how he went away from me.
That's how he went away without evening opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him...
And after spending two months like a crazy person...
I took out the dolls.
Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out.
I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days... when we were in love...
"One...two... three..."
That was how... I started to count the dolls...
"Four hundred and eighty four... four hundred and eighty five..."
It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms.
I hugged it tightly, then suddenly...
"I love you~, I love you~"
I dropped the dolls, shocked.
"I....lo..ve...you??"
I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.
"I love you~ I love you~"
It can't be!
I pressed all the dolls' stomach as it piled on the side.
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
Those words came out non-stop.
I...love you...
Why didn't I realize that.....
That his heart was always by my side, protecting me.
Why didn't I realize that he love me this much...
I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it's stomach, that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road.
It had his blood stain on it.
The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much...
"Jo...Do you know what today is? We've been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn't say I love you.... Um... since I was too shy... If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that i love you... everyday... till I die... Jo... I love you..."
The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now?
He can't be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute...
For that... and for that reason... to me... it became courage... to live a beautiful life...
I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club, I found out that I fell in love with him.
Before the trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him.
And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways.
I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there was so many other girls.
To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl...
"Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?" I asked.
"I can't"
"Why? You need to study at home?" I felt disappointment grabbing me.
"No... I am going to meet a friend..."
He was always like that.
He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing.
To him, I was just a girlfriend.
The word 'love' only came out of my mouth.
Since I knew him, I had never heard I'm say 'I love you' before.
To us, there weren't any anniversaries at all.
He didn't say anything from the first day and it continued till 1O0 days...2O0 days...
Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don't know why...
Then one day...
Me: Um, Jin, I...
Jin: What...don't drag, just say...
Me: I love you.
Jin: ...........you.....um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my 'three words' and handed me the doll.
Then he disappeared, like he was running away.
The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one.
There were many....
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday.
When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call.
But... lunch passed, dinner passed...and soon the sky was dark... he still didn't call.
It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore.
2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep.
He told me to come out of the house.
Still. I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin...
Jin: Here...take this...
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What's this?
Jin: I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now.
I'm going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday.
He turned around and walked away like nothing had happened.
Then I shouted...
"Wait..."
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me...
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung onto him.
But he just said simple cold words and left.
"I don't want to say...that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else."
That was what he said. Then ran off...
My legs felt numb...and I collapsed to the ground. He didn't want to say it easily...
How could he...
I felt that...
Maybe he is not the right guy for me...
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying.
He didn't call me, although I was waiting.
He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house.
That's how those dolls piled up in my room... everyday
After a month, I got myself together and went to school.
But what made the pain resurface was that.... I saw him on a street...with another girl...
He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me...as he touched the doll...
I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell...
Why did he gave these to me...
Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls...
In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around.
Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him.
He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house.
I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop.
I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that....its going to end.
Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.
Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn't help hating him, acting like nothing had happened and joking around.
Soon, he held out the doll as usual...
Me: I don't need it.
Jin: What....why...
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don't need this doll, I don't need it anymore!! I don't want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes were very shaky.
"I'm sorry" He apologized in a tiny voice.
He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll...
"You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!"
But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll.
Then...
Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
"Jin! Move! Move away!" I shouted...
But he didn't hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
"Jin, move!"
HONK~!!!
"Boom!" That sound, so terrifying.
That's how he went away from me.
That's how he went away without evening opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him...
And after spending two months like a crazy person...
I took out the dolls.
Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out.
I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days... when we were in love...
"One...two... three..."
That was how... I started to count the dolls...
"Four hundred and eighty four... four hundred and eighty five..."
It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms.
I hugged it tightly, then suddenly...
"I love you~, I love you~"
I dropped the dolls, shocked.
"I....lo..ve...you??"
I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.
"I love you~ I love you~"
It can't be!
I pressed all the dolls' stomach as it piled on the side.
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
"I love you~"
Those words came out non-stop.
I...love you...
Why didn't I realize that.....
That his heart was always by my side, protecting me.
Why didn't I realize that he love me this much...
I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it's stomach, that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road.
It had his blood stain on it.
The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much...
"Jo...Do you know what today is? We've been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn't say I love you.... Um... since I was too shy... If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that i love you... everyday... till I die... Jo... I love you..."
The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now?
He can't be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute...
For that... and for that reason... to me... it became courage... to live a beautiful life...
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Respect Love
This is not exactly a love story, but more about learning how to respect love ....
To My Friends Who Are...MARRIED
Love is not about "it's your fault", but "I'm sorry", not "where are you' but "I'm right here", not "how could you" but "I understand", not "I wish you were", but "I'm thankful you are."
To My Friends Who Are...MARRIED
Love is not about "it's your fault", but "I'm sorry", not "where are you' but "I'm right here", not "how could you" but "I understand", not "I wish you were", but "I'm thankful you are."
To My Friends Who Are...ENGAGED
The true measure of compatibility is not the years spent together but how good you are for each other.
To My Friends Who Are...NOT SO SINGLE
Love isn't about becoming somebody else's "perfect person." It's about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.
To My Friends Who Are...HEARTBROKEN
Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut deep as you allow them to go. The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them.
To My Friends Who Are...NAIVE
How to be in love: Fall but don't stumble, be consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but never keep the pain.
To My Friends Who Are...SEARCHING
True love cannot be found where it does not truly exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does. Love is magic. The more we hide it, the more it shows; the more you suppress it, the more it grows.
To My Friends Who Are...PLAYBOY/GIRL TYPE
Never say I love if you don't care. Never talk about feelings if they aren't there. Never touch a life if you mean to break a heart. Never look in the eye when what you do is lie. The cruelest thing a guy can do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall.
To My Friends Who Are...POSSESSIVE
It breaks your heart to see the one you love happy with someone else but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you.
To My Friends Who Are...AFRAID TO CONFESS
Love hurts when you break up with someone. It hurts even more when someone breaks up with you. But love hurts the most when the person you love has no idea how you feel.
To My Friends Who Are...STILL HOLDING ON
A sad thing about life is that when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never bound to be and we just have to let go.
To My Friends Who Are...SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you just let it fly, it would come to you when you least expect it. Love can make you happy but often times it hurts, but love's only special when you give it to someone who is worth it. So take your time and choose the best!
Three things never return:
the past, the neglected opportunity, and the spoken word.
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the past, the neglected opportunity, and the spoken word.
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Love Means
(A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)
Girl: Slow down. I’m scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, it’s too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can u take my helmet off and put it on? It’s bugging me.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not. Please, it’s too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him)
Guy: Can u take my helmet off and put it on? It’s bugging me.
In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only one survived.
The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke,
but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt
her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it
meant he would die.
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but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt
her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it
meant he would die.
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A Silent Love
From the very beginning, the girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.
Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"
As the guy is not good with his words, this often causes the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vents her anger on him. As for him, he only endures it in silence.
After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"
The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leaves, they got engaged.
The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.
One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realized that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......
The doctor says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.
During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart every time it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.
With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phone calls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....
The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.
With a new environment, the girl learnt sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she opened the letter, she saw her name in it instead.
When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.
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Let Me Love You
Once upon a time, there was once a guy who was very much in love with this girl. This romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of paper cranes as a gift to his girl. Although, at that time he was just a small executive in his company, his future doesn't seemed too bright, they were very happy together. Until one day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and will never come back. She also told him that she cannot visualize any future for the both of them, so let's go their own ways there and then... heartbroken, the guy agreed.
When he regained his confidence, he worked hard day and night, slogging his body and mind just to make something out of himself. Finally with all these hard work and with the help of friends, this guy had set up his own company...
"You never fail until you stop trying." he always told himself. "I must make it in life!"
"You never fail until you stop trying." he always told himself. "I must make it in life!"
One rainy day, while this guy was driving, he saw an elderly couple sharing an umbrella in the rain walking to some destination. Even with the umbrella, they were still drenched. It didn't take him long to realize those were his ex-girlfriend's parents. With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly beside the couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury sedan. He wanted them to know that he wasn't the same anymore. He had his own company, car, condo, etc. He had made it in life!
Before the guy can realize, the couple was walking towards a cemetery, and he got out of his car and followed them...and he saw his ex-girlfriend, a photograph of her smiling sweetly as ever at him from her tombstone... and he saw his precious paper cranes in a bottle placed beside her tomb. Her parents saw him. He walked over and asked them why this had happened. They explained, she did not leave for France at all. She was stricken ill with cancer. In her heart, she had believed that he will make it someday, but she did not want her illness to be his obstacle ... therefore she had chosen to leave him.
She had wanted her parents to put his paper cranes beside her, because, if the day comes when fate brings him to her again he can take some of those back with him. The guy just wept ...the worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them but knowing you can't have them and will never see them again
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The CD Boy
A boy walked into a CD store and saw a girl behind the counter.
She smiled and he thought it was the most beautiful smile he has ever seen before and wanted to kiss her right there.
He said "Uh... Yeah... Umm... I would like to buy a CD." He picked one out and gave her money for it.
"Would you like me to wrap it for you?" she asked, smiling her cute smile again.
He nodded and she went to the back.
She came back with the wrapped CD and gave it to him. He took it and walked out of the store. He went home and from then on, he went to that store everyday and bought a CD, and she wrapped it for him. He took the CD home and put it in his closet. He was still too shy to ask her out and he really wanted to but he couldn't. His mother found out about this and told him to just ask her.
So the next day, he took all his courage and went to the store. He bought a CD like he did everyday and once again she went to the back of the store and came back with it wrapped. He took it and when she wasn't looking, he left his phone number on the desk and ran out...
!!!RRRRRING!!!
The mother picked up the phone and said, "Hello?"
It was the girl!!! She asked for the boy and the mother started to cry and said, "You don't know? He passed away yesterday...
" The line was quiet except for the cries of the boy's mother. Later in the day. The mother went into the boy's room because she wanted to remember him. She thought she would start by looking at his clothes. So she opened the closet. She was face to face with piles and piles and piles of unopened CDs. She was surprised to find all those CDs and she picked one up and sat down on the bed and she started to open one.
Inside, there was a CD and as she took it out of the wrapper, out fell a piece of paper. The mother picked it up and started to read it.
It said: Hi... I think you are really cute. Do you wanna go out with me? Love, Jacelyn
The mother opened another CD...
Again there was a piece of paper. It said: Hi... I think you are really cute. Do you wanna go out with me? Love, Jacelyn
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Who Do You Love
John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way through Grand Central Station. He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he didn't, the girl with the rose. His interest in her had begun thirteen months before in a Florida library. Taking a book off the shelf he found himself intrigued, not with the words of the book, but with the notes penciled in the margin. The soft handwriting reflected a thoughtful soul and insightful mind.
In front of the book, he discovered the previous owner's name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her address. She lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond. The next day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II
In front of the book, he discovered the previous owner's name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her address. She lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond. The next day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II
During the next year and one-month the two grew to know each other through the mail. Each letter was a seed falling on a fertile heart. A Romance was budding. Blanchard requested a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn't matter what she looked like.
When the day finally came for him to return from Europe, they scheduled their first meeting - 7:00 pm at Grand Central Station in New York.
"You'll recognize me, " she wrote, "by the red rose I'll be wearing on my lapel." So at 7:00 he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he'd never seen.
I'll let Mr. Blanchard tell you what happened: A young women was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. Her blonde hair lay back in curls from her delicate ears; her eyes were blue as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime come alive. I started toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As I moved, a small, provocative smile curved her lips. "Going my way, sailor?" she murmured. Almost uncontrollably I made one step closer to her, and then I saw Hollis Maynell. She was standing almost directly behind the girl. A women well past 40, she had graying hair tucked under a worn hat. She was more than plump, her thick-ankled feet thrust into low-heeled shoes. The girl in the green suit was walking quickly away. I felt as though I split in two, so keen was my desire to follow her, and yet so deep was my longing for the women whose spirit had truly companioned me and upheld my own.
And there she stood. Her pale, plump face was gentle and sensible, her gray eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. I did not hesitate. My fingers gripped the small worn blue leather copy of the book that was something precious, something perhaps even better than love, a friendship for which I had been and must ever be grateful.
I squared my shoulders and saluted and held out the book to the women, even though while I spoke I felt choked by the bitterness of my disappointment. "I'm Lieutenant John Blanchard, and you must be Miss Maynell. I am so glad you could meet me; may I take you to dinner?"
The women's face broadened into a tolerant smile. "I don't know what this is about, son," she answered, "but the young lady in the green suit who just went by, she begged me to wear this rose on my coat. And she said if you were to ask me out to dinner, I should go and tell you that she is waiting for you in the big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind of test!"
It's not difficult to understand and admire Miss Maynell's wisdom. The true nature of a heart is seen in it's response to the unattractive. "Tell me whom you love," Houssaye wrote, "And I will tell you who you are."
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A Teacher's Lesson
There is a story many years ago of an elementary teacher. Her name was Mrs. Thompson. And as she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children a lie. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same.
But that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard. Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. And Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.
But that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard. Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. And Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.
At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.
Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners...he is a joy to be around."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and sometimes sleeps in class."
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present which was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag.
Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist.
Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, and writing, and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children..
Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one her "teacher's pets."
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came.. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer -- the letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, M.D.
The story doesn't end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he'd met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit in the place at the wedding that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom. Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. And she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.
They hugged each, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."
Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
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A Story On Friendship
A story is told about a soldier who was finally coming home after having fought in Vietnam. He called his parents from San Francisco.
"Mom and Dad, I'm coming home, but I've a favor to ask. I have a friend I'd like to bring home with me.
"Sure," they replied, "we'd love to meet him."
"There's something you should know," the son continued, "he was hurt pretty badly in the fighting. He stepped on a land mind and lost an arm and a leg. He has nowhere else to go, and I want him to come live with us."
"I'm sorry to hear that, son. Maybe we can help him find somewhere to live."
"No, Mom and Dad, I want him to live with us."
"Son," said the father, "you don't know what you're asking. Someone with such a handicap would be a terrible burden on us. We have our own lives to live, and we can't let something like this interfere with our lives. I think you should just come home and forget about this guy. He'll find a way to live on his own."
At that point, the son hung up the phone. The parents heard nothing more from him. A few days later, however, they received a call from the San Francisco police. Their son had died after falling from a building, they were told. The police believed it was suicide.
The grief-stricken parents flew to San Francisco and were taken to the city morgue to identify the body of their son. They recognized him, but to their horror they also discovered something they didn't know, their son had only one arm and one leg.
The parents in this story are like many of us. We find it easy to love those who are good-looking or fun to have around, but we don't like people who inconvenience us or make us feel uncomfortable. We would rather stay away from people who aren't as healthy, beautiful, or smart as we are.
Thankfully, there's someone who won't treat us that way. Someone who loves us with an unconditional love that welcomes us into the forever family, regardless of how messed up we are.
Tonight, before you tuck yourself in for the night, say a little prayer that God will give you the strength you need to accept people as they are, and to help us all be more understanding of those who are different from us!!! There's a miracle called Friendship That dwells in the heart You don't know how it happens Or when it gets started But you know the special lift It always brings. And you realize that Friendship Is God's most precious gift!
Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share a word of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us. Show your friends how much you care....
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A Touching Story
A touching story worth reading.
Dear Patrick,
I was then an only child who had everything I could ever want. But even a pretty, spoiled and rich kid could get lonely once in a while so when Mom told me that she was pregnant, I was ecstatic. I imagined how wonderful you would be and how we'd always be together and how much you would look like me. So, when you were born, I looked at your tiny hands and feet and marveled at how beautiful you were.
We took you home and I showed you proudly to my friends. They would touch you and sometimes pinch you, but you never reacted. When you were five months old, some things began to bother Mom. You seemed so unmoving and numb, and your cry sounded odd --- almost like a kitten's. So we brought you to many doctors.
The thirteenth doctor who looked at you quietly said you have the "cry du chat" (pronounced Kree-do-sha) syndrome, "cry of the cat" in French.
When I asked what that meant, he looked at me with pity and softly said, "Your brother will never walk nor talk." The doctor told us that it is a condition that afflicts one in 50,000 babies, rendering victims severely retarded. Mom was shocked and I was furious. I thought it was unfair.
When we went home, Mom took you in her arms and cried. I looked at you and realized that word will get around that you're not normal. So to hold on to my popularity, I did the unthinkable ... I disowned you. Mom and Dad didn't know but I steeled myself not to love you as you grew. Mom and Dad showered you love and attention and that made me bitter. And as the years passed, that bitterness turned to anger, and then hate.
Mom never gave up on you. She knew she had to do it for your sake.
Everytime she put your toys down, you'd roll instead of crawl. I watched her heart break every time she took away your toys and strapped your tummy with foam so you couldn't roll. You struggle and you're cry in that pitiful way, the cry of the kitten. But she still didn't give up.
And then one day, you defied what all your doctors said -- you crawled.
When mom saw this, she knew you would eventually walk. So when you were still crawling at age four, she'd put you on the grass with only your diapers on knowing that you hate the feel of the grass on your skin.
Then she'd leave you there. I would sometimes watch from the windows and smile at your discomfort. You would crawl to the sidewalk and Mom would put you back. Again and again, Mom repeated this on the lawn. Until one day, Mom saw you pull yourself up and toddle off the grass as fast as your little legs could carry you.
Laughing and crying, she shouted for Dad and I to come. Dad hugged you crying openly.
I watched from my bedroom window this heartbreaking scene.
Over the years, Mom taught you to speak, read and write. From then on, I would sometime see you walk outside, smell the flowers, marvel at the birds, or just smile at no one. I began to see the beauty of the world through your eyes. It was then that I realized that you were my brother and no matter how much I tried to hate you, I couldn't, because I had grown to love you.
During the next few days, we again became acquainted with each other. I would buy you toys and give you all the love that a sister could ever give to her brother. And you would reward me by smiling and hugging me.
But I guess, you were never really meant for us. On your tenth birthday, you felt severe headaches. The doctor's diagnosis --leukemia. Mom gasped and Dad held her, while I fought hard to keep my tears from falling. At that moment, I loved you all the more. I couldn't even bear to leave your side. Then the doctors told us that your only hope is to have a bonemarrow transplant. You became the subject of a nationwide donor search. When at last we found the right match, you were too sick, and the doctor reluctantly ruled out the operations. Since then, you underwent chemotherapy and radiation.
Even at the end, you continued to pursue life. Just a month before you died, you made me draw up a list of things you wanted to do when you got out of the hospital. Two days after the list was completed, you asked the doctors to send you home. There, we ate ice cream and cake, run across the grass, flew kites, went fishing, took pictures of one another and let the balloons fly. I remember the last conversation that we had. You said that if you die, and if I need of help, I could send you a note to heaven by tying it on the string of any balloon and letting it fly. When you said this, I started crying. Then you hugged me. Then again, for the last time, you got sick.
That last night, you asked for water, a back rub, a cuddle. Finally, you went into seizure with tears streaming down your face. Later, at the hospital, you struggled to talk but the words wouldn't come. I know what you wanted to say. "Hear you," I whispered. And for the last time, I said, "I'll always love and I will never forget you. Don't be afraid. You'll soon be with God in heaven." Then, with my tears flowing freely, I watched the bravest boy I had ever known finally stop breathing. Dad, Mom and I cried until I felt as if there were no more tears left. Patrick was finally gone, leaving us behind.
From then on, you were my source of inspiration. You showed me how to love life and live to the fullest. With your simplicity and honesty, you showed me a world full of love and caring. And you made me realize that the most important thing in this life is to continue loving without asking why or how and without setting any limit.
Thank you, my little brother, for all these.
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The Story Of A Blind Man
It rained so hard tonight. I could feel the wind piercing through my ribs.
A rainy Christmas eve. It just made me feel sadder and lonelier. It had rained the day he was buried into the ground and I had cried just like now. I was attracted to this cheerful guy when I first started helping out in the 'Home for the Disabled' three years back. He was a very special guy who was almost perfect if not for his eyes. He was blind. He became blind when he was 8.He got the high fever then and the doctors could do nothing. He lost his sight as a result.
He told me he didn't really mind not being able to see because he could always touch and feel things we normal beings weren't able to. I was really touched by his optimism. Even though he was blind, his eyes were the most soulful eyes that I had ever seen. He was extremely helpful towards others and always did his best to give others what he could. He showered his love lavishly on everyone he knew. He was like an angel. He had a kind and unselfish heart. He gave half of what he earned to charity and he would help out at the 'Home' almost everyday.
Whenever we were free from tending to the people at the 'Home', we would talk to one another for a long time. He talked about God a lot and how blessed was he to have found joy in the Lord. He didn't blame God for any misfortunes that had befallen on him. He said the Lord had his reasons for not giving him sight and he didn't blame God for the fact that his parent got killed in an accident when he was barely 12.
I felt somewhat ashamed when I heard his words since I had always blamed God for not giving me a prettier face. I bore a grudge against God for not giving this wonderful angel His fullest blessings. I thought that God was unfair to him for taking ,apart from his sight, his loved ones away from him. I felt that he truly deserved more.
Luke and I were completely different from one another. He was an optimist and I was a pessimist. He could overlook flaws easily while I would always pick at others' faults. However we did have one thing in common. We both had an undying passion for astronomy. He told me he still remembered how lovely the stars had looked like before he became blind. And how his dad used to tell him about stars, black holes and space before God took him away to Heaven. One thing he didn't know was that I was silently crying for him all the time while he talked. I knew then that I loved him more than I could ever loved anyone.
Luke and I had been together for almost two years. We could hardly bear to be away from one another for less than half a day. We spent most of our time helping out at the 'Home' and 'watching' the stars at a pasture near it. I would tell him the names and shapes of the constellations that appeared in the skies and he would listen carefully with a smile on his face. It seemed like he saw the stars that I told him, behind those soulful eyes that could never see the art of God.
Maybe God thought that Luke was too good for this world. He decided to bring him back to His side. Luke contracted leukemia that fateful 1994. He kept his illness from me and thus I didn't know anything about it at all. It was only when he started looking sick that I noticed something was wrong with him. When asked why, he would pass his paleness off as a slight flu. I didn't believe his words but I didn't say anything. It was September 1994.I was waiting at the 'Home' for Luke.' A call for you, Calista. It's from a hospital,' a helper at the 'Home' passed the phone to me worriedly.
'Yes, hello? This is Calista here. Can I be of any help?' I asked, chewing my lips nervously, sensing bad vibes in my spines. 'This is the Boulevard Hospital. We found your name and this number in Mr Pietra's wallet. He had fainted on the streets just now and someone brought him in. I was hoping that you can come down to the hospital now and help us with the documents.'
I hung up the phone and ran all the way in the rain to the hospital which was a mile away.
I signed whatever documents that were needed and ran to the ward that Luke was in. There he was my angel, lying almost lifeless on a bed that seemed too large for him.
'Calista, is that you?' He asked when I held his cold hand. 'Yes it's me,' I choked on my words. 'Aww.. please don't cry. Everything will be alright,' he smiled. I looked at his pale face and it broke my heart. 'Luke,' I sobbed. 'Why is God so unfair to you?' I bawled out on his chest.
He stroked my hair and said softly,' God is fair, my love. He's gonna take me to a far better place called Heaven. Don't you agree?' I didn't answer him as I was lost in my own thoughts. I really didn't know what was going to happen to me without him in my life. Moreover, I had this dreary feeling about going to hospitals ever since I was young. I felt so lost and detached from the world. Why must God take away my one and only true love?
Three months had passed ever since Luke was admitted into the hospital.
It was December and Christmas was nearing. My visits to Luke had grew lesser over the three long painful months. Each time I visited Luke, we would have nothing much to talk about. There was always this awkward silence between us. I didn't know what caused it but I guessed it had something to do with the atmosphere in the hospital. Luke had lost his cheerfulness over the months. He was always too tired to talk. At times, he would try his best to listen to me while I talked to him but the pills they fed him always put him to sleep before I could finish. We drifted apart somehow although I still loved him a lot. I had only visited him once during December since I was busy working and the 'Home' needed helpers desperately.
It was the 24th of December. I realized that I had not visited Luke for almost three weeks! How funny time seemed to fly when you were busy. I had prepared a gift for Luke for the past two weeks. It was a piece of cardboard pasted with 3D star stickers .I called the constellation that I made up 'Love Luke'. I hurried to the hospital with the gift in my hands. I walked briskly to Luke's ward. On the way there, I felt a sudden fear in my heart. I didn't know why but somehow, it made me hurry my pace. To my ultimate fear and worst nightmare, Luke was not in his ward.
He was gone! I ran to the counter and asked for Luke but was handed a package and a letter instead. I opened the letter with my tears flowing down like mad.
'My beloved Calista, Please don't cry when you get this letter. I just want to let you know that I will be happier at the place where I'll be going soon. God and my parents are waiting impatiently for me. I'm looking forward to see them again. I know how busy you've been these past few weeks and I really missed you terribly. I know how much U dreaded coming to the hospital although U never said anything. I felt it. To tell you the truth, I've thought of ending my life at times to end the pain and loneliness that my illness had brought me. However,I remembered that life is bestowed by the love of God and it would be a terrible mistake to kill myself just to escape misery.
Now, I'm glad God decided to take me away earlier. I don't want to be a burden to you and I cant thank you enough for all the love and patience that you had given me through the hard times and the good times. U love me just the way I am even though I cant even do a small thing like watch a movie with you. Please don't blame God for taking me away. He does it because He loves me, just as much as He loves you.
Don't ask why all the time. Things are planned and they are meant to be this way. Don't keep thinking that God is unfair and stop bearing grudges against him. God is a fair God. Everything that you lost today will be compensated in another way tomorrow. Just keep on believing. Remember that I'll always love you even when I'm not by your side. U're the most beautiful person that I've ever 'seen' in my life, even though u r always complaining about the way you look. Beauty comes from within. Just to tell u that u will always be a part of me that I cant live without. Thank you once again for your sweetness and your wonderful unselfish love.
P.S. I'm sorry that I cant celebrate Christmas with you. Here's a gift I've prepared for you ever since the start of December.
Love,
Luke.E.Pietra.
Love,
Luke.E.Pietra.
I tore open the package, sobbing all the while. Inside it was a picture made up of tiny stickers of stars.On top of the black paper was written 'Love Calista'. He too had made up a constellation for me. I knew how much effort and time he must have put in in making the gift since he wasn't able to see. I cried my whole heart out that night at the hospital. It was Christmas Day,25th of December,1994.Luke was laid into the ground. The rain was coming down hard. Nothing could describe my sadness. I was filled with remorse. In my busyness, I had neglected Luke. I should have spent more time with him. I didn't even get to see him for one last time before he died. I didn't really treasure him until he was gone. I missed him so much now. I wanted so much to hug him and to tell him how much I loved him. But it was all too late. I had let time slip by and it would never come back to me. I had lost Luke forever. Forever, that word suddenly sounded so strange to me as I watched Luke's coffin being lowered into the ground.
I cried for the man who taught me the ways of life. The one person who changed my views towards many things. The angel who taught me to overlook others' flaws and to see the beauty behind imperfections. The one who told me to accept whatever cards that were dealt to me. Now this one person had left my side forever. Gone like the two pieces of pictures that carried the words 'Love Luke' and 'Love Calista'. They were buried together with the memory of Luke.
Treasure what you have now before it becomes a regret, when it becomes too late. Time always slips us by when we least realize it. Let the people you love know what they mean to you, because you never know what might happen......life is too fragile.
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Love Is Blind
There was a blind girl who hated herself just
because she's blind.
because she's blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend.
He's always there for her.
He's always there for her.
She said that if she could only see the world, she
would marry her boyfriend.
would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and
then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.
then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the
world, will you marry me?"
The girl was shocked when she saw that her
boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.
world, will you marry me?"
The girl was shocked when she saw that her
boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.
Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote
a letter to her saying.
"Just take care of my eyes dear."
a letter to her saying.
"Just take care of my eyes dear."
This is how human brain changes when the status
changed.
changed.
Only few remember what life was before, and who's
always been there even in the most painful situations.
always been there even in the most painful situations.
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Love Is Life
Crying on my bed was what i can do that night i had no choice he called to say that he went out with another girl. whats more was there to happen know??? i was thinking. i am ready to leave my everything for him but he is already leaving me!! what am i suppose to do??? the night was hard but i took a decision that i am not going to contact him anymore and let him live the life he want to live.
with my decision days past one by one. he rarely act as anything wrong, but all the when i have to face him i just melt myself a lot. wishing i don't have to meet him. things never work according the way we want that i realize when this unexpected stranger step in my life.
he is tall, dark, fun loving, caring. first we meet in hospital when my cousin was admitted and i was there with her. slowly he started calling me.. then for those seven days we spend in hospital he was always there for me. i don't know he was secretly taking a place in my life and in my heart.
to think for that i had no time. i got my owned life tangled. which i was trying to untangle each night calling to my friends talking about my x bf. asking them whether they heard from him or not. all these time this stranger was by my side giving me support that everything will be OK soon.
the day we got discharge he was there but he was lost in somewhere else. i kept asking him whats wrong? he was saying that just tiredness of the night he will be fine. when i returned to my daily live it was hard again cox i had to face the hardness of my untangled life. but between all these one good thing that happened to be was the care n support i receive from the stranger. he used to call me, and sometimes he wants to meet me too. but i was not ready for that he never forced me to do that.
without knowing i was drown to the stranger i started texting him back, calling him when i am free. he took a place in like as a best friend whom i share my everything. we started meeting soon. the time we spend together was the best times i ever had.
one night when we met he said me to lets go for a ride. without any hesitation i answered yes and off we go. he stopped in front of an apartment and said would you mind to dine with my family tonight. i was in a shock but said yes.. i don't know why???
when we rang the front door a middle age women opened the door, she had a lovely smile and was saying welcome happily. in dinner table i first meet his family. he was the only boy in family.. he had a sister who is married and a younger sister who is studying in primary School. his father was a business man. his mother was a house wife.
when dinner was over we had a chitchat over dinner table. his mother was so good to me and caring just like him. they had great family relationship between each other i was shocked that how easy they were. around eleven he dropped me to my home. i thank him for the wonderful dinner and the night.
after that night i felt my heart started beating again and it all was so strange to me.. i started thinking he is my best friend, how can i think about him like this. he will feel bad is if he knows that i am falling in love with him. may be he has a girl friend. what an i suppose to do know?
with all these in my mind i had no courage to take to him so i started ignoring him. avoiding his calls.
then one day when i came back to home after class he was in my house with cousin. when i entered the house cousin shouted see who is here, he came to visit us after so long. without saying a word i made my way to my room but before i could close the door he entered the room and set on my bed while i was standing near door.
he started talking
he," so why you avoiding my calls now a days, got a new boy friend ahaa?"
he," so why you avoiding my calls now a days, got a new boy friend ahaa?"
me," nothing like that.. i am just busy.."
he," well i see that? you know something my family really likes you a lot they are elegy waiting when then can meet you? "
me," i am busy know a days i will let you know when i am free!"
he," hey don't be standing there come here and sit down, its your house your room, why you acting wired?
i just as a good girl go and set in my bed. then he took my hand is his hand and said u know something i haven't sleep since you started avoiding me.. i use to think what i did wrong that your avoiding me.. soon i felt tears on my hand i couldn't control myself and hugged him he hugged me too. then slowly i started talking its that i don't think its right.
i am drown to you like a magnet, i just don't know whats wrong with me??? may be my feeling are more than a friend to you. I LOVE YOU. i really LOVE YOU.. i am sorry if i said anything that hurts you..
he looked at me and said you know from the first day i saw you i felt in love with you.. and i am waiting for this day this moment my sweetheart. I LOVE YOU TOO.. he took my face in his face in his hand and we kissed...
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True Love Was Ours Then We Lost It
Almost 3 yrs ago I let my true love go, not because I didn't love him, but because at the time I thought it was the right thing to do. You may have all heard of my story - (Lessons in true love sometimes means letting go)? Well I still think of him very much and hurt from the lack of his touch and from the songs he would sing to me.
This Man was very much In love with me. Every time we were with each other he would give me his fullest attention and I would give him mine in return. Everytime we were apart we would feel that crazy feeling until we would be wrapped up in each others arms again. Then the day came that we would say "so-long"... it was not a bad break-up or anything, it was a heartfelt one, meaning that we parted with broken hearts because we were still so much In love with each other He was needed by his children who lived thousands of miles away from me and I have children here where they needed to be at the time because their father was here too, (not living with me). I had no choice but to stay, at least that’s what I thought at the time.
After Rick had left I waited for a call or an email, anything that would let me know he was safe, but I never received anything from him for a long time. I started thinking, was it only me hurting as bad as it seemed? I would talk to his friend Jay and ask, "has he heard from Rick?", 'yes! and he is doing fine.'
I was so hurt that he would call Jay and not me because I thought he would be more concerned about me and how I was getting on with my life.
I kept getting news from Jay about what Rick was doing but still no word, then I heard that Rick found himself a lady!
My heart broke.
After 6 months I came to terms with it - at least I thought I come to terms that it was over. I had started leaning on my best 'online - male friend, Ken'. We started getting serious about each other after a few months, maybe because at the time we were just two lonely people. In the meantime things were getting really bad at home, my ex was harassing me and I started getting concerned for my childs mental health, and my own, so I did what I thought at the time was best for us. I moved to another state which gave my Daughter an advantage because her grades went up and she had many dreams fulfilled and Ken treated me good but seemed always frustrated with me because he is so set in his ways ( which he never showed me online, but not in a bad way, just a snobbish kind of way at times).
During some times Ken is very good to me and I do Love him. After being here a few months Rick showed up online and we started talking as friends even now deep down I was upset with him but I pretended to be over him.
These are the childish things all of us do sometimes in life I guess, but a year later we started opening up again. Rick now lives with another woman and he loves her very much they have even just completed upon a home they bought to live in and his children have given him a lot of grief since his return.
A few days ago he told me how special I was and told me he was still in love with me and missed me so much. He told me he was always proud to be by my side and told me he thought of me often and that I was beautiful and missed how we would write songs together and sing. He even told me I was the Best woman he has ever been with. And I told him I still loved him too and missed him with all my heart and all my soul but we have a problem now and we both are very caring to people around us. See now we have other partners and we don't have the heart to hurt them because for one I know Ken has been hurt 3 times in his life by women leaving him for another man and I am not sure of Rick's girlfriend's past relations but I do see the pain in Ken's eyes still from his heartbreaks and I won't be the cause of another. So now I have to live once again with this yearning inside me and the need to be with Rick because I ca't leave Ken without him wanting me to go himself. All I can say is I love Ken very much and I thank him for taking my child and me into his life and sheltering us from the pain I felt when I let Rick go and for saving me from the mental abuse that my ex was throwing at me and saving my childs future because she is graduating this year with High grades compared to the failing grade she had where we once lived, also for treating my daughter like his on I do Thank Ken very much so. But I also want to thank Rick for letting me experience true love because he did a lot for me too and to let the whole world know I still am very much I n love with him and no matter how hard I try I will carry him inside my heart till the day I die because I want so bad to be with him but I can't do that to Ken and he surely can't do that to his Lady either. Aching Inside Always,
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Something I Got Off The Internet
He came into my life unexpectedly. Sorta like a movie, you know, the kind that leaves you with little tears about to fall from your eyes. A huge lump in your throat, and inspiration. A drive that makes you so sure you will find love out there. (Wishful thinking?)
He came into my life unexpectedly. Sorta like a movie, you know, the kind that leaves you with little tears about to fall from your eyes. A huge lump in your throat, and inspiration. A drive that makes you so sure you will find love out there. (Wishful thinking?)
We met on the internet. I can already hear the peanut gallery's snide remarks and deftly dealt blows to my intelligence, my morals, my thoughts. After all, I must be crazy, and he must be an axe murderer right? I must be desperate, after all, to fall in love with a man over the internet. No, none of the above. (You pessimists just have to chalk this one up to a loss!) He is the most caring, compassionate man I have ever met. And I can say that with all honesty, with all truths freely tossed into the lion's den for approval.
At first, I wasn't expecting it to happen. Wasn't looking for it. But I wasn't against it. I was open to it sub-consciously I suppose. Searching for that fairy tale somewhere, my internal thoughts caught up with the rest of science and dove into technology as well. I had heard so much about it happening to real life people like me, from places in the world I had never heard of, but it happened! I had talked to him on and off through way of chat rooms for about a year. In this year, I didn't get to know him really. Except the fact that he seemed like a really nice guy. He intrigued me. Maybe it was this portal into another realm we were both opening up. Making it harder to not talk. It's all you can do, just type out your inner most thoughts, and delight in the very thought of making a 'friend' online.
We started talking, and I wanted to know more about him. I got excited when I saw his name in my e-mail inbox. Even happier I was when replying to him. I was pouring myself out to this stranger, and he was responding. Giving of himself more and more each time he hit Send, as was I.
In this chat room, we had 'mutual friends'. Other people that regularly chatted and with whom shared a bond with us. We knew each other's names, who had kids, each other's love lives, or lack thereof, and who was allergic to what. A kinship was born in this chat room, but all of that was irrelevant as I asked this other chatter, "What's his phone number?" I asked, he gave. I called him that night.
Our phone conversation was great. I was attracted immediately by his voice. He was feeling the same way about mine. But there had to be more, right? There just has to be! I was thirsting for more information from him. I simply wanted to know everything about this man. We had seen each other's pictures already, sent through the wonderful e-mail services. Our eyes glanced upon each other's pictures and saw a promising something there. We liked each other at this point. Promises to call each other were made, and more e-mails were sent.
Finally, we fell in love. Just like that. Fell. Head over heels. And I can say this, without hesitation, that I fall in love with this man more and more every day. When I hear his voice, BAM, I fall in love again. When I look into his eyes, BAM, I'm in love again. Anything this man does equates to pure, sweetened love for me. Of course, there's a loop hole. Isn't there always? We are long distance. I represent the East Coast, and he the West. Was it possible, is it possible? Yes and yes. We talked endlessly about this. Tip toed around the fact that it would be hard, but took into the account that it wouldn't be easy. Pored over every obstacle that would stand in our way, and would eventually test us and our strength, had we gotten together.
We talked about our wants, our needs, our desires at this time. What we wanted from each other, and how we could go about it. We knew all we wanted was to be together, but could we handle it? Were we ready to take on something so rough? We have. Overcoming the distance, the money issues, the conversation issues, well, it hasn't been easy. But we don't think any relationship is a bed of roses. We take the good, and the bad, and we still love each other.
Through this love we have grown stronger. We have learned from each other. We have taken our relationship beyond the levels of just something we got 'off the internet'.
Meeting was like a dream. I was absolutely on pins and needles. Seeing him though, only reinstated my previous feelings I had felt for him, and made them that much stronger. Love at first sight? Oh, it happened alright. We have shared so many times together. His presence completes me. The lost piece to my puzzle. The one thing that I can hold onto in this world. The one relationship I have ever felt love from. He loves me. Plain and simple. With my flaws and all. He sees the good in me, and I can see it in him. I have found my true connection. Without him, I'd simply be searching for something that couldn't give me what he gives me. It would only be false, and I know this to be of truth, because for once in my life, my heart feels what my head does, and their both in sync. I'm loving every minute of it.
When you hear the proverbial warnings of finding anything reliable on the internet, scoff away the remarks. It can happen, it has happened. When you hear the woes of love tales gone sour, just know that love is alive. It is all around us, and it will find you when you least expect it. And in the last place you would ever think of finding it.
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Crushed
It was last year when I met him during a school carnival. I was walking with my friend into the school of business when she bumped into her classmates. I didn't know what actually happened but I remembered I was staring at this particular guy in the group. From that day onwards, he never left my mind.
It was last year when I met him during a school carnival. I was walking with my friend into the school of business when she bumped into her classmates. I didn't know what actually happened but I remembered I was staring at this particular guy in the group. From that day onwards, he never left my mind.
After months of consideration, I finally took the first step. I wrote a letter to him confessing I actually was attracted by him and if we could be friends. I got my friend to pass him the letter and we started being friends.
At first, he didn't know what I looked like as he didn't remember seeing me. One day, my friend tricked me into going to her computer lab. He was there. It was then we first met and spoke. He shook my hand and introduced himself. Ever since then, I started seeing more of him.
I started sending him messages to his cell phone daily. It could be a daily good-night message or just to tell him to take care. He would usually reply to my messages. One day, after the exams, I finally asked him out. We went to eat dinner and after that, we went back to school at night and sat at the exit staircase staring at the stars, drinking and chatting. It was then I felt that I was really in love with this guy. He sent me home later. From that day on, I could not get him out of my mind.
Somehow, I started seeing him quite often. He works at Starbucks so I would go there to study and hang out. Hanging out was just an excuse for me to see him. We would bump into each other in school daily and smile and say Hi. Sometimes, we would joke around and just chat.
During Christmas, I bought a gift for him. It took me some time to actually pass it to him. He was appreciative. In return, he gave me a wallet. At first, I was joyful. Then, I found out he gave my friend a Christmas present too when she hadn't bought him anything. But that didn't mean anything to me. Receiving a gift from him was all I could think of.
Months later, after our second trip to the movies we started seeing each other less and the messages became less. After 4 months, I finally got my friend to ask whether he liked me or he knew my feelings for him. All the while, she wanted to ask him that but I wasn't ready to face the truth. Deep down in my heart, I actually knew the answer but I couldn't face up to reality. After 4 months, I felt I was ready.
I got my answer. He rejected me. He didn't like me. However, my friend didn't tell me that. Instead, she got another friend to tell me the answer over the phone. I kept silent and tears started falling from my eyes. The tears just kept falling. It didn't stop.
My heart was shattered. It left a scar behind. I no longer can love. I no longer can face him. To me, love was a mistake. But I would never regret ever loving him.
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A Beautiful Rose That Has Withered Away
She was sitting there. in the front row of the classroom.. She was the hyperactive chatty gal that I would love to loathe...
At first sight, there was simply nothing extraordinary about her. I was annoyed at her seemingly uncontrollable mischievous personality. But then again, I looked beyond that and recognized her warm and mature personality... And that her large brown eyes enthralled me....Captivating me with her sweet and jovial smile...
I fell in love with her........
There was only one thing I can... and must... do... I gotta let her know how I feel.. I did, and that's the start of a wonderful, forever lasting love... or at least that's what I thought.
Those were the happiest times of my life. I would call her numerous times a day..... Life for me was heavenly. I had always dreamt of loving my other significant half to the max, even when I was a young child. This was a dream come true for me. She was almost the perfect girl I had dreamt about before. She loved me as much as I love her (I still do...). I would embrace her tightly to feel her warmth and kiss softly on her forehead. I long to be with her forever. Words alone could not describe the blissful times I had with her. Her distinctive voice would just banish my blues away. We never squabbled before. Life is truly a heaven to experience such a true love. For me, true love is always 0.1% lust, 0.9% attraction and 99.0% appreciation. I had always appreciated her and so did she.
Those times went on for 2 years. But then, the inevitable happened. She became aloof, unresponsive and her cheerful disposition had diminished. "What happened to her"? I asked myself...Gradually, she lessen her phone calls to me. I tried coaxing her to talk to me but to no avail. Then, after weeks of coaxing, she finally told me that she had changed (she didn't know why, it just came all of a sudden). She told me that our characters do not match and sad to say that we should not continue the relationship. She implied that I'm a person who does not care much about the world around me (which is quite true as I don't trust friends and I'm quite a loner) She also said that there are small little things that also add up to her unhappiness. I was devastated... I didn't know that she felt that way all this time... Well, I knew about my weaknesses but I thought that she accepted them. I cried and pleaded her to stay on with me but to no avail as it was only the most sensible thing for a matured person (such as herself) to do. She said that its better for us to separate rather than go deeper into an unhappy relationship than is doomed to failure (which is, sad to say, true). I am still in a deep depressed state. Its been 4 months since she broke up with me...
How I hope to be with her again. Its actually not her fault. She was doing the only sensible thing (to break up before we go any deeper). Sometimes, I feel like life's fragile.....
A beautiful thing like love can be ended abruptly Feels like a precious thing had been taken away from me...
Just like a beautiful rose that withered away....
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Broken Promises
Married 11 years. This is my one and only love. He proposed to me on a playground. This was the man who taught me the meaning of love. We were a part of what God truly meant to be as husband and wife. My best friend, an aura of comfort as I held him in my arms. Every physical and spiritual fulfillment in a man I ever wanted. Not once did I want anyone else. No one could take his place.
We were to renew our vows. I practiced for months, my new vows-I would repeat them in the car, or in the grocery store silently. I could not wait to begin our next years with good histories, and good hearts. To show him in renewed vows how over many years, ups and downs, I held solid in my devotion.
And then promises were broken.
At first I focused mainly on how I couldn't even breathe without him. A pattern of hurtful words, plans never made and even an affair. I endured pulling him back from someone else's arms, his eyes so sincere with lies, his words so very melodical and spellbinding. I listened believing every word he said. I crushed every time he entered a room. I could not see or believe what was going on. No Christmas presents, no birthday presents, no anniversary plans carried through, talking to me like I was a stranger, a list too long to share.
I often asked myself, 'What did I do?' or 'Why did he do this?' It took a while for me to figure this out. He had changed. I did not change. My love was still strong. I could battle all external things, but not the man himself.
His last promise he made was that he was going to come back to me and we would live together always, never to be apart, grow old together. He told me he cried when he thought of what a mistake it was he said by telling me goodbye two days after Christmas. Then just weeks ago he tells me that his job has become more important and he knows I have a job that I finally have after years of looking. When a man picks a job over his wife...well it's time to leave. But that's not the worst promise broken.
The one thing I asked him not to break was that I asked him not to put me through any more pain. This was my final outcome.
I took the final step and decided to walk away. I am ready now. He has lost the one thing he should have never let go of. I think I deserve better. I am the one who has no guilt, or remorse. And it takes my own strength to break the chains I put on myself by loving a man and forgetting to respect myself.
There is strength in the power of goodbye, it all begins with courage.
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Lovely Coincidence
In 1945, there was a young boy of 14 in a concentration camp. He was tall, thin but had a bright smile. Every day, a young girl came by on the other side of the fence. She noticed the boy and asked him if he spoke Polish, and he said yes. She said he'd looked hungry, and he said he was. She then reached in her pocket and gave him her apple. He thanked her and she went on her way. The next day, she came by again, bringing with her another apple which she gave him. Each day, she walked by the outside of the fence, hoping to see him, and when she did, she happily handed him an apple in exchange for conversation.
One day, he told her not to come by anymore. He told her he was being shipped to another concentration camp. As he walked away with tears streaming down his face, he wondered if he'd ever see her again. She was the only kind soul he'd seen across the fence.
He made it out of the concentration camp, and immigrated to America. In 1957, his friends had fixed him up on a blind date. He had no idea who the woman was. He picked her up, and during dinner began talking of Poland and the concentration camp. She said she was in Poland at that time. She said she used to talk to a boy and gave him apples daily. He asked if this boy was tall, skinny and if he had told her that she shouldn't come back because he was leaving. She said yes.
It was her, the young girl who came by every day to give him apples. After 12 years, after the war and in another country.....they had met again. What are the odds? He proposed to her on that very night and told her he'd never again let her go. They are still happily married today.
Now that, my friends, is a love story. Miracles do happen, and there is a greater force at work in our lives.
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Amazing True Love Story
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in urban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work.
They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve. They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc. and on Dec. 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished.
On December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days. On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sunk when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 6 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home.
On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, hand-made, ivory colored, crochet tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross-embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later. She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc. to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area. Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet.
"Pastor," she asked, "Where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crochet into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria. The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and here husband were well-to-do people in Austria. When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home. That was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return. One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he was not leaving.
The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike? He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for here safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a concentration camp. He never saw his wife or his home again for all the 35 years in between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and the pastor saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
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Internet Love
A young girl. 13 years old always wanted love in her life and never knew how to get it. Oh how she wanted to be loved and wanted to love. One day she went in a chat room not looking for a special relationship with someone, just felt like talking. She met a nice young man, told her he was 19 and he was nice to her and she liked him. They exchanged e-mails and kept in contact. Everytime the girl would talk to him and have fun, she only thought as him as a good friend but, one day he started telling her how he really felt about her.
By this time it had been three months they had been talking. She started realizing she had some feelings for him to but, she didn't want to think this was a sex offender or anything so she just told him what she really felt about him and why she wasn't opening up to him. He understood but, was sad. He said he never wanted to hurt her. After a while they stopped talking and she grew sad because she missed him. He said he was caught up with college and work and couldn't be on much. he came back on and she told him that she loved him, she just knew her feelings for him then.
They had a relationship over the internet for a while, they were so happy. Then he stopped talking to her again for a while. He came back on and told her he was gone cuz of school and work again. She understood and was just happy he was back. He said he had to go for a little bit but wanted her to talk to his roommate and become friends with him. So she agreed. They talked and as she talked to him, he seemed so much like her love, he talked the same way and made her feel good the same way. Then she started thinking maybe it was a joke and tat she was talking to her love the whole time and he was just being mean. She was confused. The boy started saying he really liked her and that he thought he loved her. She grew scared now. Her love came back on and started asking if she liked his roommate. She told him he was a very nice boy. He started asking if she would want to date them both, he and his roommate. She started thinking he didn't love her as he led on and didn't care if she was with another man. She told that to him and said she was sad. he told her he loved her so much but, wasn't sure if he was who she wanted.
After that they forgot about the whole thing until the girl got an offline message from the boy and it was saying he was going to take her away from her love because he loved her so much. She told her love and he got upset with his roommate. After that the boy was told he could only be a friend to the girl, he didn't like it but, he wanted to talk to her so he accepted the agreement. They all stopped talking because the boys computers got a virus and the girl never knew that. She grew lonely and thought her love would never talk to her again. So, she sent him a message saying she didn't want to be with him anymore.
The next week while she was on the computer the boy came on and told the girl that her love had been arrested for attempting to have sex with a minor. By this time the girl had already turned 14 years of age. She was so upset. She still loved him. The boy was nice and talked to her and made her feel better. She started realizing the boy wasn't such a bad guy. She grew to realize the man that she loved had lied to her. He never loved her and was just playing a mean joke. Now the boy says he loves the girl and she likes him a lot now but is afraid the same incident will happen again. The boy knows this and accepts it and will wait for her till she knows how she feels or even wants him. She found a better man.
After a couple years she met this boy in person. She never told him how she felt they just talked for a few years. She finally thought it was appropriate at the time they met that she told him she loved him. She did that and he was happy, he thought she never cared for him. But, he was wrong. Then they went out together for a year and they got married and had a baby girl. They were married for 5 years when the girl grew ill while she was pregnant with her second child. She gave birth to a baby boy and died a week after his birth. The baby boy was born sick and died the day after the mother.
This was a girl who was truely loved by her husband and got as she wished. This man was her miracle and she had now been loved and loved too.
The boy raised his daughter, she was raped at age 16 by the man her mother onced loved. The was sent to prison. The daughter gave birth to a baby boy and raised it. The father loved his wife so much that his daughter looked so much like her that he couldn't stand it anymore. He thought he would go crazy and think his daughter is his wife and do horrible things to her that wouldn't be horrible if it was his wife. He killed himself thinking he would be with his wife. But, he never found her. For he had been put in another place.
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Red Lipstick Kisses and A Black Eye
My first wife used to cover me with red lipstick kisses before we made love. I must admit, it really turned me on. I would watch her applying it while standing in front of a mirror. After finishing, she would turn to me and begin kissing me all over my face and neck.
One night we had a terrible argument after having too much to drink at a party. I'm embarrassed to admit it, but she had bruised my male ego. The party we had been at was both indoors and out. There was a bad mitten net in the backyard and we started playing. At first, we just volleyed back and forth, but then started a game. Some women started watching us and keeping score. The first game was close, but she pulled ahead toward the end and won 15 - 12, receiving a loud applause from the women spectators. During the second game, the women started really getting into the game, calling it a battle of sexes. When she won decisively (15 - 7), they cheered all the louder. I started to walk off the playing field, thinking we had played enough when my wife yelled out; "What's the matter, afraid to get beaten by a woman in front of everyone?". I agreed to play another game and got soundly trounced. I think it was around 15 - 3. We stayed about two more hours and consumed more margueritas than we should have.
While we were driving home, she kept talking about how much fun it had been. My replies were short and with a bit of an edge. After a while, she became angry about my attitude and things started to escalate. When we got home, it got much worse. At some point, I said something really ugly and she whirled around and socked me right in the eye, knocking me flat on the floor. I'm not sure if I was knocked unconscious or not, but the next thing I new, I got hit with my pillow, which she had thrown. She stormed off upstairs and locked our bedroom door. I staggered over to a sofa and fell asleep.
I really should have put ice on my eye before falling asleep because in the morning, it was almost swollen shut. My eye was all bloodshot and the bruising around it was dark black and blue. I was so mad at my wife. How was I going to explain this very black and swollen eye to everyone in the coming week? I think my wife was a little shocked when she saw what she had done. However, she didn't say anything and we stayed clear of each other for most of the day. In the evening I was watching a football when my wife came in the room dressed rather provocatively and with her red lipstick on. She sat down next to me. I tried to ignore her and watch the gave, but then she began kissing me. I kept trying to hold on to my anger but she was wearing me down. After a couple of minutes, I took a glance at our reflection in a mirror on the wall. She looked at the mirror the same time and our eyes met. I probably had a dozen red lipstick all over my checks, forehead, neck, everywhere except close to the black eye. (It was real sore.) We both broke up laughing. Then we started laughing about the whole situation, the bad mitten game, the argument, and the black eye. She went and got her camera and set up a timed picture of us embracing - me with my black eye and covered with lipstick kisses. She had it framed and used to show it to her friends and tell them the story behind it. Funny thing, neither of us could remember what I had said before she let me have it. While telling the story, she used to say; "we can't remember what he said, but whatever it was, he knows better than to say it again".
We didn't over-indulge ourselves with alcohol very much after that. I learned not to say hurtful or damaging things when we argued. Also, I worked at overcoming my fragile male ego. Fact was, she was a better athlete than I and regularly beat me in tennis, bad mitten, volleyball, ping pong... you name it. She even beat me a few times arm wrestling. I didn't mind so much, as long as it was just between us. She came to realize that she had a hot temper and worked to mellow out some. She also came to a better understanding of the male ego and easily it could be bruised. I loved that woman.
I lost my her to breast cancer after 13 years of marriage. I sure to miss her.
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The Sweet Love
There’s been someone that I cared and loved so much. For once in my life I’ve felt the warmth and happiness that I never felt before; that there is magic in every laughter, every touched and every moment was worthwhile. Have you ever thought, how sweeter could love be?
Everything began, when I was at the third year of my high school. It all started in one afternoon; everything in my life began to change. I was just sitting in the bench waiting for my driver to pick me up when suddenly I bumped some of my classmates and asked me to go along with them. Without hesitation, I stood up and gone together with them. As were walking along the sideways of our school campus, Lisa the girl who had a long straight hair of our group, one of the famous genius of our class and was also called our class president began to whisper to them, “do you see what I see?” “What? What? What did you see?” they replied. “Have you seen those two they’ve been silent for minutes, aren’t they perfect for each other?” “You mean Ashley and Jake,” they cried out loud. “Ashley and Jake are perfect for each other,” they began to teased. It actually annoys me but suddenly Jake the tall, dark and one of the hottest athletes in our school began to pushed me so hard, I began to feel mad at him and in return I give him my best shot to pushed him. When I noticed that it passed two hours so I hurried to the gate but Jake stopped me and began to ask if he could walk me to the gate of our school and I agreed. That day was one of my best days ever. From that day on, I started to think how small things could make you so happy. So day after days, we do the same things after we were dismissed by our teacher like doing some silly games, walking along the sideways of our school campus and goofing around was our thing and every night Jake and I would exchanged SMS messages.
Four months have pass, I’ve been thinking it out to myself why this crazy little things could make me gone insane, it feels like every day was full of happiness and surprises. The day of the talent show came everyone was thrilled and excited. The room was full of energy and everyone feels like dancing, well except me and a few of my classmates. Jake came to me and wants to goof around again I feel annoyed but I find myself caught up in his silly jokes, the way he smiles and laugh made my heart leap in every time his with me. He gave me courage to be who I wanna be and so I dance with him. There was even a time, when I was paired with another classmate of mine he was known as Chase the coolest nerd of our class and by the time we were dismissed Jake had been avoiding me. Upon realizing that he was been avoiding me it makes me feel happy the thought that he was jealous of me together with another guy. Night came, I send him an SMS message containing “Jake, I know we’ve been close for a little while. Just tell me honestly one thing, are you jealous with me and Chase?” I waited for his reply but it never came.
The last day of the school year came, I was beginning to think that I was drawn unto him and decided that this would be the day I would confessed my feelings for him. I can’t let things end just like this; feels like my heart would lose a missing piece without him. I ran all around the corners of our school but I never saw a traced of him. My heart became weak and restless, like my heart wanted to burst in excitement just to tell him that I love him way too much and I would feel breathless without him.
Summer came and I’m having the most boring days of my life stuck in my room checking the net, until an SMS message came. “I know we’ve been good friends. Whenever you need me I’ll be always here for you. You can even share your secrets to me. Now, can I ask you a question, who is you’re crush?” It came from Jake, the thought came to me as I received the message what if I tell him now, and my heart was beating faster and thought how would I reply him? So I decided to tell him the following day. Early in the morning, I raised up from my bed just to send him an SMS message containing: “What if I tell you, it’s you?” He never did replied.
A week came and I received the message that I’ve been longing that Jake would tell me and it said, “I LOVE YOU.” Knowing that he loves me, my heart jumps filled with joy and happiness. Without hesitation I send him an SMS saying, “I LOVE YOU, TOO.” It had been one of those happy moments of my entire life. Days pass by and everyday I’ve been feeling blue.
The month of June came and I’ve been feeling excited in seeing Jake again. It was never long enough until the first day of school came I walked along the hallways looking for him but before I could do so I met some of my classmates. We’ve been talking for a moment when I noticed there was a familiar figure heading towards us. Knowing that it was Jake, I turned around as if I didn’t notice him. When suddenly Vanessa one of my tallest classmates during third year and the one with black long hair began to cry aloud, “Ashley, its Jake.” As he walks along behind us, he suddenly touched my shoulders and I began to feel uneasy to move, it brings me sparks beneath my spine and my heart pounding so rapidly. Vanessa teased, “Hey, look guys Ashley is blushing.” Upon hearing those words it makes me feel so embarrassed. Realizing that Jake and I aren’t classmates anymore it makes me feel insecure and missing him more and more. Whenever we meet at the hallways, we can’t stop staring and smiling at each other. The following day, I was busy talking with Vanessa and I never noticed that Jake was just right behind us. I began to spoke, “Hey, who turned off the lights?” I feel so uneasy upon realizing that it was his hand that is binding my eyes, no wonder it is so warm. Everyday Jake would come and visit me in my classroom. There was even a time I was bullied by my classmates not anyone cared for me but except him. He tried to protect me from being hurt. He even said, “I would not allow myself to let anyone hurt you.” During that moment I feel safe and comfort. All my tears dried away because he gave me courage to believe in myself. Usually every love story ends in happily ever after but not all.
It was a nice weather to start the day not until I heard that Jake had a girlfriend but I thought it was just a big joke played on me. I never believe what the rumors say. Everyone was dismissed and so I headed to Jakes class I saw him together with Bianca one of the campus heart throb of our school. I felt my heart crushed into pieces as I see them talking and glancing at each other. My tears started to fell so I ran off and headed home. I made a promise to myself that I would forget everything about him. The following day, there he was at our class trying to catch my attention. He stared at me, his eyes full of questions. But I didn’t mind. He didn’t know how much courage I take to cover up my pain and endure it all. The following months was the most heart breaking moments of my life? Every day I would just stare at the window pane thinking of him, wondering if he misses me too, even during lunch time I snacked out of our class and head towards the restroom, there I would cry alone all by myself all those sad thoughts kept running gently in my heart the feeling that were close yet we were so far away and each night all those magical moments we had kept ringing in my head all night, the feeling of warmth and happiness was now long gone and the pain that I can’t bear take over me. One afternoon, accidentally I met few of my classmates last year and Jake was there too. When he saw me he began to turn around and walk out of the room. I hate the feeling whenever someone turned around me. I began to rush unto Jake like my heart is controlling me and telling me to do so. But I lost the sight of him. I believe it was never an accident but it was fate. There was a time, I saw Jake cry alone, and my heart is thorn as I saw him cry, I can’t bear seeing him cry and all I wished for him is happiness, during those times all I had in mind was to hugged and comfort him and tell him that I still love him but there isn’t a need for me to do so because I never was his girlfriend. So I hide behind the tree and deny all my feelings for Jake when all I wanted was to spend another moment beside him. But I was drowned with all my heartaches and pains, thought I could get over him with just a month but a month wasn’t enough than I expected. There was also a time I had my craziest moment that I couldn’t even control of myself in chasing after him but there was no sign of him. I was tired and my heart is raging with desires for him. Thinking, how would I smile without his presence? How would I laugh without him goofing around me? But, I don’t wanna think I’m selfish just because of love.
Graduation came, but this time around it was different. When I tried to look in his eyes, there I saw full of curiosity and pretending but still I don’t know why. My heart is confused and all I could think was him. His name sings in my ear, the moments we had been stuck in my head, his heart was still dwelling inside me, though tears reappear as the seniors make a farewell to the high school life. Knowing, I won’t see him no more my heart was filled with sadness. After graduation, I felt so helpless every day I can’t eat well and each night I felt sleepless crying over him.
A year had passed but I never regret knowing Jake, knowing that he is happy, I would be happy too. There were moments in our life we gave up just because of love. But we choose to love over and over again even though how many times we’ve felt pain. Because knowing that we have live and had loved was the most wonderful thing that God had given unto us and I’m grateful, if I hadn’t known Jake I may never know what it feels to risk everything for love.
For now I know, love is the sweetest pain, love is the sweetest feeling that we can’t resist. For the people who read this story believe it or not, true love really does exist. Just keep on believing that fate, destiny and love are in your hands.
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The Boy In Her Dreams
by Ana Montoya
i dont love you...josh repeated in a cruel voice; as pushing valerie to the floor. You never meant anything to me! Learn how to forget.. cuz i forgot about you.. a long time ago. Valerie was lost of words... she reached out to him...touched him one last time, and died right there on the spot.. his love was her life. His words were her sickness. But he never believed her.. Josh stared in pain. grabbed her hands and said... I love you, and never stopped. His tears came down, warm as ever. Josh wanted a second chance, but she was gone now...
6 years ago.... Meeting him<3
Little ValeriE + Little Josh... love at first sight.. the door swung right open... little valerie raced outside, giggling at everything in sight, While Little Josh stared from the window...wondering if they will ever make friends... Little Valerie raced showing off to Little Josh, He only smiled from inside wondering if she noticed him. Then His door opened, Little Josh walked outside, shy as ever. Started chatting with Valeries younger brother. Little Valerie stared at the angel a few inches away.. She was shy, walked slowly back inside, praying he didnt see her.. Little Valerie looked from inside her window. and noticed Little Josh staring straight at her. As Valerie said. butterflies never felt so good. Valeries little brother came racing inside, and grabbed her by the hands and said...he wants to see you.. Little Valerie raced inside the bathroom, giggling within herself. as she picked up the big brush to comb her hair. Gave a quick smile at her refelction and slowly walked outside.. Little Josh stood there. Cute red sparkled in his cheeks. He was nervous, So was she..
4 years later... its true love
Valerie was in love... it didnt take much to realize it. Josh was a female magnet. But he changed. He wasnt as shy, more into videogames.. He stopped asking for Valerie..Valerie feared this day. but it came.. she was crazy in love with him. he was her everyday thought.. Days passed... she was scared of loosing his attention. Trying different things to hook him into her heart again. From standing in the spot where they first met.. waiting, no sign of him. Valerie imagined there childhood, remebering every special momment with him,, which was always. His door was closed, his windows were shut.. Her heart shattered into many pieces, she took 2 steps back home, but his door slowly opened. he peeked outside.. Tears came rolling down from Valeries Face. She ran to him, he opened his arms to her. Then they gave a kiss, A kiss that nieghther of them will ever forget. Her heart was slowly being put back into one. Her lips felt as if they were touched by an angel.. ever since that day, they sent secret messages to each other... The last year of middle school was beggining.. Valerie doodled his name all over her paperworks, got distracted from his words...
1 year later.. the sad truth :its not up to me anymore, if you want me in ur life,youll find a way to put me there
Love wasnt a phase in Valeries World, it was reality and pain. She knew the real definition. She felt it. And no one, couldve changed her mind. To her love was magic. He was her spell. Warmth and joy circled around her everyday life, as his name repeated in her head. But days to come. he was no where in site. Then Valerie took a brave step outside. Looked around, yet he was still not outside. Valerie took a deep breath and walked towards her lovers home. Where the smell of him, drowned the surface. Valerie peeked inside, and saw Josh with a girl. They were kissinng.... Valerie knocked hard on the door. As he came running outside. Josh... I love you... Valerie said breathless. Well I dont, leave me alone Josh said while closing the door. He was gone forver, and so was she. She died from his harmful words.
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Real Life Love Story
by Sophie Malhotre
by Sophie Malhotre
i remember each and every moment spent with him, even the pettiest of details still feels like yesterday. i first saw him when i joined this new school. he was very rude and unwelcoming, i had a fight with him on the very first day.
after months we started talking, i just started finding him very interesting and after a few weeks i started thinking of him as a good friend. i never really told him much but just listened to him. unfortunately, i got a dare from my friends and i asked him out he thought i was otherwise and told me that he likes me too. i thought he had forgotten about it, i never really talked to him about it and i just kept on assuming things which was a mistake.
we did stuff together like, we would pass each other notes in school, roam around in the breaktime but that was it. the cutest moment was when i asked him if he could come to meet me after school as he used to have his soccer practice and i stayed back for some school work. i was going to the cafe with my friends when i saw him waiting with his friend just where i asked him to meet me, so that is something i still remember because it was something sweet yet so kiddish! but then ofcourse we got into a major fight because of our classmates, they created misunderstandings and after that we didnt even feel like looking at each other.
we used to be in the opposite corners of the class.
we came to a new grade, we both were happy in our respective lives. i hadly even noticed him although we were in the same school activity but we didnt even look at each other, atleast i didnt. but then after months he started becoming friends with my friends, which was confusing for me but i hardly bothered. my friends were desperates and they accepted him as a friend.
we came to a new grade, we both were happy in our respective lives. i hadly even noticed him although we were in the same school activity but we didnt even look at each other, atleast i didnt. but then after months he started becoming friends with my friends, which was confusing for me but i hardly bothered. my friends were desperates and they accepted him as a friend.
they used to play games and stuff together but i didnt because of him and i knew he was aware of that. i remember the excuse he found to talk to me was whether i was going for this concert or not and i just told him a no! he asked me for a week and then didnt. he would just stare at me a lot and talk to my best friend a lot but i tried to be oblivious as much as i could. then one day my friends surrounded him and started asking him who did he like? and he took my name, my friends told me that and it was so shocking for me. i didnt know whether to be happy or not.
he HAD to ask me out when he wasnt even ready and i didnt know, i became his girlfriend, but we didnt do anything that would say we were in a relationship we hardly talked. then i took a stand and to clear out everything, i called him although he was having an extra class, he talked to me and answered everything. he did like me a lot and i was very happy, the next day i planned to surprise him by being the sweetest girlfriend ever.
i had planned a few things but when i came to school something else was planned for me. i was talking to my bestie, telling her how much i liked my boyfriend, when my friends came upto me and told me that he was talking ill about me to people, i got very angry and in a rush i broke up with him. i was as confused as much as he was. after the breakup i secretly started talking to him online and i found that he was a very good person and i was falling in love with him, but somehow my friends came to know that i was talking to him and they created misconceptions again. we stopped talking, stopped looking at each other and here i was falling in love with him....this was the end of one more grade!
the next grade starts and in a month i came to know about some shocking truths, one of my friends in our group had a crush on him so they tried to break us up but well nothing could be done now, we were not talking anymore. she even asked him out but he said no! well i was happy. so anyways after 2 months of our break when we came back to school, things had changed, he was staring again, talking to my friend again and again we had started talking online. he would eavesdrop and everything. one incident or rather a day which is still special is my birthday, he had brought me a gift and i was unaware, he was so shy when he gave it to me. but then he got sick and didnt come to school for almost a month.
when he did come back we were having a great time, he would make me laugh, eavesdrop and he sat right infront of me, so i thought something was going to happen. i even gave him a birthday gift, a wrist watch and he wore it everyday to school for sometime, then he would jus bring it in his bag. he even picked up a fight with his friend for it. i got sick and didnt come to school for a week and in that week everything changed.
he told my friends he liked someone else. i couldnt be more disheartened and that was the time when i realized that i was in love with him and now there was no looking back, i couldnt get over him. everyday in school was mundane, yet he would do sweet things for me which annoyed me but when i looked into his eyes they were full of guilt and i couldnt get more sad. the only thing i didnt understand was i could see it, i could feel it, we both loved each other, we couldnt even stand together, there was that unsaid awkward silence between us and somehow i was aware of it. once i saw him pretty low in school and i had a talk with him, i told him to ask her out and that she likes him too. the very next day i came to know they both were together, the only part that surprised me was that i didnt cry, i was happy for him. then we got so busy with exams and everything that we didnt talk again. after exams just a while we would talk online and thats it. and one more grade ended!....
our sections got different, he took up different subjects and i thought that this was the new beginning, but sitting in a different classroom killed me. although i could still see him everyday but not everytime. after months my bestie suggested we write a mail to him telling how i feel and i got so influenced that i did. i did get a reply from him, a positive one, that shocked me. but anyways after a few days he asked for my number and we would send each other forward messages, one day he sent me a romantic message and i knew what he wanted. the very night he called me up and asked me out, i refused i dont know why, i told him maybe after our exams and that was my mistake and his mistake that he thought otherwise.
so then my bestie had a talk with him and he told her that he just asked me out for fun and he didnt like me at all. it made me very angry, i called him up frantically but he ignored. after a month i called him and we discussed, he totally denied asking me out and we ended fighting. how was i to give up so soon. i tried again after a month, i called him and then he told me that he likes me a lot and that i screwed up, he had to lie cuz he thought i made a fool of him infront of my friends. things got sorted out and we started going out. everything was fine, he was so busy with his studies that it sometimes made me angry and impulsive with him, but then things would get fine.
after two months we broke up again becuz he was ignoring me a lot and i thought he didnt like me anymore. he accepted it, didnt talk to me at all, infact ignored me so much that he just didnt take my calls. i felt insulted and in my ego i didnt bother about him...and there we go again....another grade ended!
this was our last year in school and i wanted it to be memorable, but somebody wanted it the other way. he started getting into fights a lot, he changed as a person. after a month we again got into a fight because of some stupid reason and after a week he apologized to me. afterall it wasnt my fault. i thought things would get better with us again and no! this wasnt out time indeed, another popular girl asked him out and they both were together now.
things were bad for me this time, i cried, i was like bella of new moon for months. but my friends my oh so lovely friends! were there to make me going. i had the most fun time that year, he did call me on my birthday, i did call him once for some work, he did stare at me like he will eat me all the time when we came across each other in school but it was all good, he was still with that girl and i was happy in my life. our school was ending we had our farewell night, i cried like a baby thinking that one guy i ever loved didnt even say a goodbye but no! he approached my friend but he couldnt find me.
my friend told me later and i messaged him but he called me back and that night we talked for more than 2 hours. by the end of the conversation we had bid our goodbyes to each other. but things took a u turn, we were again talking and discussing how stupid we were to screw up every year like that and that how much we liked each other. it was a really emotional moment for me to know that those moments which were special to me were to him too. but one night he cried like a baby over the phone because i told him that i wasnt really serious about us in 8th grade. for him it was serious, for him he did love me, for him what we had was so special and in that instant i knew he still loved me. things eventually grew and even after our exams ended and school finished we got together again.
this time it was great, it was different, it was very serious. i couldnt have been more happy. we had our sweet little alone moments, everything was great, but he was too possesive and insecure. so something went wrong and we broke up again, this time it was a major breakup. but i discussed with him and he agreed to work it out, we werent under the label of relationship but we were still talking like we used to, we even hung out. he made my birthday special and then after two days he told me he liked someone else.
he was to go to another city for his college and i was staying in the same city for college. so i just knew this was the end, after a week he told me that he was with that girl.
currently we are not talking anymore, its not like we are in a fight, i dont have anything to talk to him and so does he. if hes happy then even i am. the story ends here, i can never get over him but i am moving on, building my life again....
so i guess we never really were meant to be but we gave it an honest try!
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Adorable Story
by Lilian abou hamdan
by Lilian abou hamdan
Our story starts at 28_11_2008...! my boyfriend talked me be 4 1 year he taled me that he love me.. but i think that he is just a boy like anny other who comes and tell i love u... and he dont know any thng of luv.... so i ignore and complete my life normally..... !!
he was higher class then me but in same school yah he used 2 look at me so much but i ignore and ignore until a day we become fds.. we start talking through internert and by summer we became so close 2 the instant that i found my self that iam just waiting him 2 go on & when he pased i ran 2 see him but i refuse 2 beleive that he luv me however he used 2 tell me "i love u" whenever he can,he used 2 be in the same plce that iam in.. yah he realy do his best 2 gain my attention....!
knowing that i was coming up 4rm a bad bad bad relationship so i was refusing 2 eneter a relation or 2 luv... !! i was searching 4 a pure love andd a pure boy the boy that tell me u are nice and not hot the boy that love me 4rm inside and not because of my apearance a boy that need my heart and not my lips ,not my body,a boy that know the meaning of love ,care and respect,that turns 2 his friends and tell them thats the girl thats my love thats the girl i need.. and not shie and lieing...
i was searching 4 that guy a guy that i need 2 love i need 2 gain his heart a guy that dreams of my happiness and my eyes be 4 any thing... and i found him.... day by day i found that all wut i was searching for is in that person yah he is he is that guy.. then i realise that i love him...!!
on 28/11/2008 we went 2 the cinema he hold my hand then he asked me... he asked of i love him .. and i told hime yah i told him " i love u " from that day every thng changed every thng 4rm that instant my life turn upside down....! day after day i love him more and more... and know i cant live without him impossible he is everythng in my life ...!
my only dream is to stay 2 gether 4 ever i rly adore him and he also do we love each other in an amazing way...! so i hope that this adorable story will never end and i hope that we will stay in that love story,and after 5 years or more ill complete for you that story with a greate events....!!
our story is amazing is special greate and without ending because love stories doesnot have an happy ending cz true luv never ends...!!
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My Real Life Story
by Grace Charlton
by Grace Charlton
Love in life has not treated me well recently. I am currently a college student and my boyfriend dumped me about a month and a half ago. We had been dating for almost five years (all of high school) and we had been living together for almost a year. Everything was perfectly fine. We would talk about getting married and having kids and all of our lives together. Then one day, out of the blue, he dumped me. He claimed that he had not been happy with me for several months, although I doubted this as we seemed to be really happy. I could deal with that though. What I couldn't deal with was when I found out the real reason he left me a few days later.
He had met another girl at work and left me to be with her. They had been talking about it during the week before he left me. I found a note that was laying in our apartment from her (I had not yet moved out). She talked about what an idiot I was and how she agrees that he should be with her. After we broke up, he had sworn up and down that he wasn't interested in her and that's not why he left me. But he lied.
I didn't understand how he could so easily throw me away and forget me after five years, and I still don't. I don't understand how he can not care about how badly it hurt me and well, just not care in general.
I lost my faith in love. The thought of going out and finding someone else really terrifies me, and I don't really believe in any truly love anymore anyway. The only place I've ever seen it is in movies and books. I thought I had it, but I was wrong.
It hurts so bad to think of him moving on with her. Of him being with her. While I feel like I've done a good job of dealing with it, I'm still so angry. I don't miss him anymore, nor do I love him or ever want him back. But I am so overwhelmingly angry and I don't know how to express it, to get it out. I wish that I could confront him about how much he hurt me, but I know he wouldn't care and that would just hurt me all over again. I truly feel hate when I think of him, and I don't like that feeling. I try to be a very nice and happy person, but now it feels like I have a big black hole inside me, consuming me.
I've never felt any sort of anger or hatred to this degree, and I am looking for a good source for it. If I could find a way to deal with that, I would be okay. But I haven't found that yet. If you ask me, love is a joke and not to be trusted. I would love to believe differently, as I used to be a hopeless romantic, but I just can't
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A Sweet Innocent Girl
by Megha Bachani
Once there was a sweet innocent girl named Reena, she was the only girl of her parents, you can say she was daddy's girl..!!
As she passed her 10th grade with distinction, she decided to take science with same school, her parents and family supported her for that. But when she'd gone to take her result, her classmate Julia insisted her to go with the diploma studies, thus they went on farther information and finally she went on to the way to college at the early age of 16.
by Megha Bachani
Once there was a sweet innocent girl named Reena, she was the only girl of her parents, you can say she was daddy's girl..!!
As she passed her 10th grade with distinction, she decided to take science with same school, her parents and family supported her for that. But when she'd gone to take her result, her classmate Julia insisted her to go with the diploma studies, thus they went on farther information and finally she went on to the way to college at the early age of 16.
There everything was new with her except her friend Julia, both were good friends. Reena here met many new girls and all were attracted by her sweet and innocent nature, while Julia was different from all. Reena's dad gifted her an I-pod which she took at her college.
The new students did not know that the mobile phones and i-pods were strictly prohibited in the college. Thus Reena went on with Julia to meet their other friends downstairs of the college building, putting on the i-pod on her ears and dancing..
There came a boy and told her about the prohibitance and told her to keep the i-pod inside her pocket, there Julia thanked him, but Reena was very shy girl so she didn't say anything at all.
There only the principal came and took of the cell phone of Reena's classmate, but the guy forgot to inform her. So she was punished. Julia then told Reena about the guy to be very great and all.
After some days, some of the boys of Reena's class were making noises and listening to the songs, so one of her classmate went to inform this to the principal, so he came in and punished those boys. So the guy who saved Reena's i-pod, his name was diabo came to her and blamed her for this, she din't spoke a word, then came Julia and told him it was all her who told the principal. Then he went to their classroom explaining the people that unity is necessary in the class. Then he asked to the girl whose i-pod had gone away, standing besides Reena, so she went to sit on her bench. Thus he opened the i-pod topic and suddenly Julia said ya..it was Reena..the topic got over as Reena didn't respond.
The days went on and diabo always came to their class suspecting to the people that principal had given him the responsibility of their class to him. Thus he was just being oversmart so some people started hating him and Julia and Reena were one of them. There Julia she told this to Reena and also one of her friends. This news then got spreaded over touching the ears of Diabo.
The day when he went to their class, Reena was absent so he called Julia and asked if he was a punk, so she said " Yes, if you are doing such things and blackmailing then you are a punk." Then he told her that"Because of you, your whole class will have to suffer..you will have to pay for this." She was very much frightened about him as he was a senior and also a good guy in principal's eyes. But then Reena told her that he can't do anything except frightening us. So leave such discussions. He is just a dumb.
As the guy's eye was on Reena, whenever she came and go on by his side, he and his friends chased her saying that"PROUD TO BE A PUNK".
Days passed by and the day came when Reena and Julia had to get seperated as their classes got divided. Then Julia got new friends as well as Reena, but unfairingly, she got attached to wrong friends, the friends who were close to the punk. Reena's best friend of those days, Lara was the busmate of the punk and she told her the positive aspects of that guy and then Reena's hatred turned to something fair and uneven, she changed her mind thinking about that guy. Her way of watching him changed as she never watched out or notice any of the bad boys or the punks. Even Lara told Reena that the punk had told her"She'll also have to pay for what they did as she was Julia's bff."
Again one day Reena went to the library with Julia when the term was going to end and the christmas vacation was to start, there they needed to do a time pass so they took a quite intresting book in the library and wanted to read, but as they were juniors, they weren't allowed to take any book and read it. So came the Diabo and asked Reena if she needed help, so he got the book for her, but this time Reena talked to him thanking him for the first time.
That time Diabo was very happy. Then he turned to say that he would have to return the book that day as their vacation would start from next day. So Julia replied to meet him there at 4.00
Thus both Julia and Reena went upstairs to the reading room. They read the book very annoyingly. It was about the handwriting tests. Then they saw that Diabo had also come upstairs in the reading hall, finally it was quarter to four, Julia said to Reena to give the book back..but as all the boys were sitting around, she was getting quite wierd, thus Reena told Julia to go and give the book. Thus she lended it to Diabo.
After their winter vacations, Lara and Reena were moving around at the road besides the canteen, thus Reena saw the punk, she moved away like she didn't see him. Then as Reena was recieving someones call, Lara talked to Diabo wishing him New Year, Diabo was continuously having look on Reena, but she overlooked away.. thus said Lara that diabo was watching her.
Days were moving and once Reena was going through the stairs in the college building at lunch time, so diabo stopped her and asked to talk after lunch time, so her friend replied that she's not intrested in boys..!! Then Reena and her friend Trisha went to temple for eating some apples and having their snacks. There came diabo for talking to Reena and they had some talks. After sometime, Reena went away with her friend to Lara. The days came when Reena and Diabo got into good friendship.
The days moved on and Lara came to know about the Diabo's truth and all his misdeeds, he had made friendship with her to get to talk to Reena. After that she told Reena about him and thus after some days, Diabo and Reena's friendhip broke up.
Their term ended and came the exams, Reena wasn't able to concentrate on her studies, also her brother came to know about Diabo and thus he warned her to break the friendship orelse Diabo would be in trouble. The days flew away like anything and finally the next term came.
Reena messaged diabo after many days, to talk then he got angry on her asking the reasons.
So after that she stopped all that also.
When the college re-opened, diabo started flinging around Reena, but she didnot understand his movements. After sometime, she didn't see him anymore around and thus she felt weird thus she went to talk, again they started chatting and suddenly Diabo came to know that Reena was in love with him, he also stepped out the same thing. But Reena knew it was not the same feeling by his side. So they remained friends. But again Diabo now wanted to break their friendship all of a sudden, that was because his friends said that Reena was not good enough for him. He thought them to be true, thus he decided to break the friendship. But now Reena got so much attached to him that she was not able to leave him. So he asked her to be perfectly fit for him in everything just like physically toned, then she would make her his girlfriend and propose her infront of everyone. He would also confess her infront of his parents and marry her finally.
But as it was the truth that he mostly believed his friends, his friends didnot at all wanted him to get close to Reena, and he also got bored out of Reena thus he broke up with her complaining to the Principal of the college. As he was an evil guy, he told everyone that Reena was behind him since many months and thus he got tired and complained to the principal. Thus the pretty charming girl of the college was now considered as the worst. Though everyone knew that he was evil guy, but he had the proof of messages but Reena had deleted all his messages so that noone could blame him, specially her brother.
Finally Reena broke up into pieces, she was not able to believe her eyes that what she previously saw in Diabo, as an evil guy, as a Virus.
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Real Life Love Story
by Alyssa Jonen
by Alyssa Jonen
It's hard being young because people think you don't know anything about life. But truth be told, I don't think I will experience anything worse than I have, who knows I could be wrong but still.
In early to mid 2007 I met a boy named Jake. I was 15, nearing 16. He was 16, nearing 17 or just gone on 17. He captured my attention instantly at a mutual friends party, there was something there but after the party I did not talk to him often. Roughly a year later we started speaking again and the sparks were still there. We planned to hang out but I started dating his close friend before this. A few weeks later his friend and I broke up because he was pretty much a pig.
Soon after this, Jake and I started to hang out, before we knew it on the 24th of October 2008 we started dating at a gig. Most memorable night ever. We were THE couple, all my friends wished they had someone like him. Then I became moody, we started fighting heaps. In May 2009 we found out I was pregnant. It was the best and worst news I'd ever received. We agreed to abort even though he knew I didn't want this.
Things became too much and I ended the relationship in June. After this, things got hectic and Jake couldn't let go. He decided he wanted me to keep the baby but I'd already told my mum I would get an abortion because it was what she wanted.
After the abortion I didn't speak to Jake for months. Then I found out in August that my friend was crushing on him. I began to talk to him again because I knew he'd start dating her and I wanted us to all be friends. It broke my heart when they started dating, and hearing about their sex on myspace. The girl even said if she didn't know any better she'd think she was pregnant which sent me spiralling. This entire time I cried every night and crawled into foetal position I was so sad.
Finally, in late September we both admitted that we still loved one another. They broke up, she is still my friend and moved on and I am happily with Jake again. He is a few months shy of 19 as I am of 18. Nothing can separate those whom are truly meant to be together. Still gets me down sometimes that I had an abortion and he had another girl whom he felt for, but I'm moving on and we are happy together. :)
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My Own Story
by Omar Sharief
by Omar Sharief
I have a friend, who is very Beautiful. I met her when we had Our Quaterly meeting in Office. SomeHow I got her number,& we used to Chat a Lot.. Few days passed and our friendship grew stronger. She became my best buddy.
Then came the day when I proposed Her. I still remember it. It was My friend's Marriage Day. I Proposed her through SMS(big mistake of mine). It was the most unforgettable moment of my life. I Did't get any reply from her..Later in the evening i got a Msg Saying that " We will be Friends Forever" ..That Msg Brought me Some PAin..The next day i was Very Shy to talk to her...
My friends supported me in those trying days. I Knew that She Won't be Mine, but still I continued loving and thinking about her
I tried to forget her..I had to carry on in life without her..
I tried to forget her..I had to carry on in life without her..
I didn’t even think about my future. I just knew one thing — I love her...After that brief instance, we didn’t meet for nearly2Weeks. It was a period of heartburns and tribulations. We had lots of quarrel, but we still stayed with each other. There was something that brought us together, It was strange, we could neither stay apart nor together. But there was always this strong bonding and we continued conversing on the phone. Hours used to pass and we couldn’t realize it. I cared a lot for Her..
After remaining apart and keeping alive the fire between us, we again met. That meeting was the most precious gift . I was tense and speechless when I met her.The day we did, we had a fight over a small misunderstanding. Sometimes, lack of conversation can lead to misunderstandings that can never be sorted out. I tried a lot to resolve the differences, but She dint want it to happen. I don’t know why. I thought She was frustrated. I left her alone for few days, thinking time will bring her back. But She didn’t. Maybe, She never felt my need in her life.Life seems to be so easy, but it’s not.
Whatever happened, I am still grateful to her because She was the one with whom I fell in love. Now, when I feel like expressing myself, I can’t do that. She is not with me. I know, now She will never turn up. I still love her and will continue to love her ..She Has Gone, But Not Her Love.....
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I Met My True Love
by Celest Marvilla
I met my one true love when I was in college hence at that time we were just classmates/schoolmates and was not attracted to each other. Time flies, after 10 years we had communication, exchanging messages to each other but didn’t push through to a more serious relationship.
I was surprise one day when he sent me a message online asking how am I and if we could meet to chat. I then decided to give it a try anyway it’s been a long time that he’s been trying to probe his feelings to me. We started going out learned about each other’s past. Both of us are in a relationship a few years back. But now both of us are happy, enjoying each other’s company.
He courted me, treated me the way I really dreamt of and felt his love all the time that we were together. It was the first time I felt this way to a person and was loved in return. We were so happy, we have plans for the future, laugh at it and he even suggests to save and get married. I was so excited when I heard those to him. But sometimes good things come to an end.
He just walked away with me without saying a word, I waited for him to come back, swallowed my pride and tried to reach out but he doesn’t replied to my message and ignored my calls. I just want him to know that I loved him so much and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
After 15 years of waiting we just end up like that and now he has a family of his own. It never came into my mind that he will tie a knot to any girl coz all I want from him is his commitment. Thou I don’t have regret in loving him even in the simplest way; he just didn’t give me a chance to prove to him how much he mean to me. He just can’t wait for me since I still have a lot of dreams to be fulfilled and responsibilities to attend to.
One by one, I achieved my goals hence the consequence of those are not having you forever. I understand what happened to us and I will always will… Take care cheesecake, you will always be my Dee forever…
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A Love That Was Sealed In My Heart
by Sweetzel Taayan
I’m Bradella but my friends call me Brandy; I am 14 years old and a sophomore. I am the average kind of girl; I’m not popular however I got good grades in all my subjects. But honestly I hate school. I only have few friends whom I can trust; I am not new to my school hence I’ve been studying there for 8 years since my first grade. I’m just not the out-goer type, I am shy-I just stay at home during Saturdays and Sundays and even during holidays. I don’t also attend much to parties even if they had invited me.
Let me start my story during the opening of school; I enter my school with my small bag filled with paper, a notebook and a ballpen. It always been like that during first days, we don’t go on with classes immediately, we use that day to introduce ourselves.
I went to my classroom; it’d been filled up with some students I knew and some students which I only knew by faces, I’ve seen them during freshmen years. I went to put my bag on a vacant sit on the center row, and then headed back outside to look for my friends. I saw Eunice one of my closest friends. We talk for awhile until we heard the bell rung signaling for the morning ceremony. We do this everyday-sing the national anthem, and pray. After it the bell would ring again signaling the start of classes.
My adviser was a guy-he is tall, a little bit chubby and white. He seems to be funny and exciting. He introduces himself to us, he is Mr. Valcour, and he’s also our biology teacher.
Next thing, he let us introduce ourselves one by one. The first boy on the first row was the first one. I look at him and listen; he’s one of the coolest guys during elementary years, and of course ‘till now. He changed a lot but still good looking. I knew him but I didn’t know his name. It’s the first we’re on the same class-that’s why.
He’s names is Damian. He also mentions his hobbies-like playing the guitar, one of the best volleyball players in our school varsity and etc. isn’t that cool? I love guitars and I wish I could have one, but frankly-I don’t know how to play it. I love singing, some says I have a good voice-but who knows they just don’t want to hurt my feelings.
I’ve been busy looking at him, and didn’t even realize it was my turn. My teacher called my attention over and over until he came right next to me and pinch my cheeks, yanking me back to the present. Its very embarassing, everyone laugh including my teacher except for him. He just look at me with he’s cold eyes. I force a smile focusing my attention to the class. I stood up reciting my name, my hobbies and some things they didn’t know about me.
After classes I went to my friendss and discussed the things that happened. I told them my story and then they laugh and laugh-but I didn’t feel offended, because after all it was the most embarassing thing that ever happened to me.
A few days later, I’ve developing feelings for him, but I didn’t mind because this happens to me-as a teenager. A new crush-that’s it. But I wonder why it only occurred to me this time when I met him everyday during gradeschool. I didn’t knew the answer but I didn’t bothered to asks my friends though, because some might betray me, so I just kept it as a secret.
I’ve been seeing him everyday, looking at him everyday, stealing glances at him everyday until days turns into months. And these feelings grew deeper and deeper until I can’t hide it anymore. But as a shy girl, I’ve been cautious to all my actions. But now I knew him even more. He isn’t what I thought the first time he look at me. I thought he is cold and rude but no-he isn’t like that at all. He is kind and funny, sometimes we talk and he makes me laugh. We became bestfriends or rather friends…
Or whatever you call it we just became close friends and many had been jealous about it.
Those times when we talk and laugh together –I like it. I even wanted us to stay like that forever but I have to spoil those moments because I have to remind myself about my growing feelings for him. I don’t want to tell him because I’m afraid he doesn’t feel the same way.
One day, he came to me and I saw he’s eyes filled with gloom. I ask him what is wrong and he told me without hesitation that he just broke up with he’s girlfriend-Stella. Stella belongs to the popular girls and she almost had everything I do not have. But the negative side of her is being bossy; she’s been my classmate a few times.
I knew he loved her a lot; our schoolmetes even called them the HS sweethearts. To all our conversations together she was the only subject, so I can’t help getting jealous. I remember one time when I really get jealous that cause me to leave him alone. That was when we are in the library doing our projects together. He was the one who started up the conversation and I was like saying to myself ‘I’m full of this’ and ‘I’m full of that’, ‘could you please stop it’. I stood up picking my things not realizing what I’m doing. He asked me where I am going. And I said I was going to the comfort room. He asked me again, why I need to bring my stuffs in the comfort room. I didn’t know what to say next so I headed to the door leaving him behind. When I opened the door, Stella and her friends went coming in. I didn’t do anything I just let them in first before I can get out. As I closed the door, I look back to Damian as Stella went approaching him.
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‘Now that he’s single, maybe you could use this chance’, my mind argues with me, but I didn’t listen. Yes, I might be inlove with my bestfriend but no, I can’t use this opportunity he needed a friend right now-not a lover.
I comforted him, letting his pain fades away, and letting him cry. I was surprised when he said; “you’re the only one who accepts me when I cry. She said, boy’s doesn’t cry because it’s a sign of weakness. Although I didn’t believe her, and I wanted to tell her it’s not a sign of weakness but rather it’s a sign of being real. I cried many times not letting her know, because when she did-she would leave me. So I tried not to cry because I love her. But when I saw her with somebody I felt betrayed and abandoned-.”
“But I’m always here,” I said.
“Yes, you’re always there. That’s why I’m very thankful that I have you.”
I let him continue what he was saying earlier.”-I cried and she saw me. You know what happened next?”
I looked at him, my eyes starting to water but I turned away to wipe them.”She broke up with you” I said slowly and quietly, that I’m not sure if he heard me.
He managed to smile a little; (yeah I guessed he heard what I said).” No, she didn’t…” he said, still tears falling down his angelic face.”…I broke up with her.”
I was shocked; I thought he loved her, why would he break up with her?
Is that really what love is? - To let go?
“Why?” I asked.
He grabbed my hankerchief into my arms and use it to wipe he’s tears.” I realized she’s not worth it.”
“But you love her.”
“I love her but I also realized its just one sided.”
I gasped and and covered my mouth. “How dare she?”
He just smiled. “I guessed she didn’t love me the way I’d loved her. When I broke up with her she didn’t even cry, I thought she would but she didn’t, however she said ‘thank you’.”
I gasped again. In disbelief I told myself, ‘who wouldn’t love this boy who is ever so loving, caring and honest? Maybe he’s the last kind of good natured boys who thinks love is a precious thing.’
We fell silent for a moment, and then he straightened up and said,” I guess I’ll just wait for the right girl to come, for the moment I will focus to my studies as I wait for her,’
It’s been a while since he uttered that word ‘studies’ he’s been busy wasting his time with Stella the past few months.
I smiled and he smiled back, the kind of smile he gave to Stella everyday, the smile I had been longing since the day I saw him.
The next day he arrives at school early than the usual time he came 5 mins. Before the bell would ring, he’d been late many times.
‘He’s really looking forward to his studies,’ I observed.
After classes we meet at the library to do our homeworks, that’s the only chance we talk and be with each other. Rumor has it that it was because of me Damian and Stella broke up. It begun to spread to the whole campus, but I didn’t mind-as long as I am with him, I’ll be fine, safe and protected.
As days passed, he didn’t talk about Stella anymore nor mention her name once. It made me happy though for some reason it also made me sad, it is as if theres some thing he doesn’t want to tell me, things that kept he’s heart shattering into pieces.
The next day was Saturday; he called me to go out, but difinitely not a date-just going out as friends. I always hesitate when he’s asking me to go out, because I’m not an out-goer-remember. But today I didn’t hesitate nor think twice, I heard the trembling of his voice on the phone-he has been crying. I told him I’ll be there a minute and he said he’ll meet at the park.
I rode a taxi going to our meeting place. I saw him sitting on the bench-alone. I immediately approach him and saw he’s face all red from crying.
I fumbled in my pocket for my hankerchief and offered it to him as I sit beside him. He was relly boo-hooing now, and passerby’s wouls stop and stare at us. He didn’t mind-I to didn’t mind. He started talking about what had happened. He told me he’d seen Stella with that guy again, and admitted he still didn’t get over her. And then suddenly he asked me this question, “If I’m gone will you miss me?”
I stared at him and I can not move. How would I react? He isn’t joking around, he’s serious. I run those words into my mind…
If I’m gone will you miss me?
If I’m gone will you miss me?
If I’m gone will you miss me....?
The things that first came into my mind were, he’s telling me he wants to kill himself or want to far away. Why would he need to run away? It made me cry from the thought itself, I turned around so he wouldn’t notice it.
He looks at me waiting for my response but nothing came into my mouth and it hurts me and made me cry even more.
Love is so unconditional; if only I’ve seen it coming I should have controlled and fought it. This situation is too hard. It’s too hard to stand and to hard to bare.
When will he ever realized how much I love him?
Why did I fall inlove with my bestfriend?
We are two people put together, but couldn’t be together due to moral senses. I felt torn and devastated. I had to admit the fact that all he can give me is friendship and nothing more.
Is this all we`d ever be? Is this all we ever could be?
Why wouldn’t he just choose me, and let me be the one?
Why can’t be the two of us?
Why can’t he love me?
I hate seeing him hurting himself and I hate to ruin this friendship though I love him.
I love even he loves someone else-someone who doesn’t deserve these tears. She’s not the one who’s always on he’s side when he need a shoulder to lean on, she’s not when he needs somebody to care for him, she’s not there when he feels lonely…
She wasn’t there. She never did.
I was the one who is always there for him.
I’m the one cares for him for than I care for myself.
Why does he need to feel this way for her?
These where the things I wanted to tell him-but can not.
He continued to tell me something more but I did not intended to listen until I heard ‘dropping and ‘migrating’.
I asked him about it and he said, ‘he’s dropping school and they’re migrating to US’.
My heart started to break apart. US! I don’t think I could get any farther away.
I musn’t cry; letting him get away might be the only way he can get he’s heart back and to let him start again.
I must let him go for the best…
I must let him go to find he’s way-he’s life…
I must let him go to find the better girl for him that will love him and care more that I do…
And I must let him go for I love him and wish all the best…
Without telling him how much I love him.
Before we went apart he gave me something to remember, a bracelet that he had kept for Stella but hadn’t gave it. He wanted me to keep it and to take good care of it.
So that day we bid goodbye to each other and hug for the very last time. In my mind I said, ‘if we don’t cross ever again-I bid you goodbye…forever, my best friend and my only love. I love you forever.’
Weeks and months had passed since the day he left. And I’m still hoping that someday he’ll come back… and someday…I wish he’ll also feel the same way about me.
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This Is My Love Story
by Ken Brown
In 1973 we moved from the hills of eastern Kentucky back to Louisville. I was glad to see that we were coming back home. The years spent in the hills I didn't care to much for the snobs I went to school with. The best part of Eastern Kentucky was the fishing, you can have the rest. Anyway we didn't move to Louisville, we moved to Shepherdsville. What a one horse town. Sundown the place was dead. It was great to live in a small town.
Well I was fond of the opposite sex. In fact I was perverted even back then. I remember going over to one of my Mom and Dad's friend house and I would sneak into the basement and I found his stash of Playboys and Penthouses, I was in heaven. I tore pictures out, but I really got into reading on how to make Love to a woman. So with that I was ready if the opportunity came.
Well the first girl I liked was Katrina S. I met her in Art class and she was cute as can be. I was nervous when I tried to talk to her. I never did tell her how I felt because one thing I was scared as hell. Plus nobody dates guys who are fat. Yes I was a lardo. So I kept a lot of feelings to myself. I wanted to say "Hey I like you." However I was a big chicken. So I never expressed myself.
Then there was Treasa B. Oh was she good looking. She was a pretty little girl with Braces. For some reason Braces seem to turn me on. I guess it stems from the first girl I ever kissed, Darlene W. You never forget your first kiss. I liked Treasa a lot. Once she was sick and I felt so sorry for her, so I wanted to send her some flowers. That what you do when someone is sick. So I went to the local florist and told them I wanted to buy flowers for a friend that was sick. The suggested Yellow Roses! I said no not Yellow, she has Yellow Jaundice. So I knew girls like roses so I sent a dozen red roses, not thinking about the romantic aspect of sending red roses. I hope I didn't send her the wrong message, even though I liked her. I did take her out once, but it wasn't a date. Just riding around having fun. I never told her how I felt, still a big Chicken. I didn't want to get laughed at.
I got a part in the school play. I was the Rabbi in Fiddler on the Roof. I loved being in the play. You know I am a ham anyway. Well on night during practice I met and fell in love with a girl that took my heart. She was beautiful. She had long black hair and a face that when I looked at her I would just die inside. She was the prettiest girl in high school to me. She told me her name and I knew that she is the girl for me. Her name was and is Timmie. Oh how that name would turn me on. Her voice was like music and her smile would drive me wild inside. I fell so madly in love with her. She had my heart. We dated and we had fun. I had an old beat up Ford Galaxie and it was a POS. However it serve us well. Oh Timmie was all that I thought about. She was the greatest cook I ever met. She used to make me cakes and let me tell you, her cakes were to die for. Made from scratch. Oh how I loved her cakes. I think I gained ten pounds with her. I was so in Loved with her that I wasn't thinking about how to make our relationship better. It was great to be with Timmie. I think she got bored with me.
One day I was at work and she showed up with another. My heart broke. It felt like I was kicked in the chest. Pain filled me and I ran to back room and cried. I heard someone call my name and I tried to straighten myself up as not to look like I was crying. well then I knew that my love of my life had found another. So I gave him her and let her go. I remember the night she told me it was over. I left the farm that night in tears. I still Loved her.
After losing Timmie, I wanted to find someone else to take the pain away. I couldn't. My heart was set on Timmie. So I just looked at other women as just there to fill a void. Well I was unlucky at finding anyone and I was tired of living in Kentucky. Jimmy Carter was president and the country was a mess. No jobs and no hope for me. So I joined the Navy. I wanted to escape from, family, rednecks, Bullitt County and try to get over Timmie. I spent a longer time in boot camp because I was a fat ass. They wanted me to get into shape, ( I was a shape, pear shape, that's a shape right?). So I was put into a group of other lardos and we exercised daily.. I got to where I could run a mile in ten minutes. Well then I finished boot camp and was returning home for a visit. I wanted to fined Timmie but she wasn't around. I was so bummed out that I couldn't see her. I wanted to show off my new look. I was really disappointed when the Navy assigned me to the USS Wabash. I couldn't believe it. Here I was escaping the Kentuckian area and they stick me on the Wabash. When I got to the ship, well I wasn't impressed. It was in the ship yards getting a refit. Turns out she was an oiler. Like a 7-11 on the high seas. We delivered food, mail and fuel to the fleet. So I went through some training on how to work on this ship.
Well I found myself in a bar close to the ship and I met Sandy G. she reminded me a lot of Timmie. She was a Timmie's replacement. So we dated and I asked her to marry me, but when it came near to time to marry. I backed out. She wasn't Timmie. So after her I just treated women as objects and never really love them. Just gave them what they wanted and really didn't respect them. After all they were sleeping with me. I enjoyed the time I spent in the Navy. Many nights out at sea I would look up into the night sky, see the billions of stars and think about Timmie. I decided that I had to get out and find her. I still loved Timmie. I said a lot prayers and wished on many stars that one day I could see her again. I wouldn't let my love for her die. I would listen to Love songs and just think about Timmie and would want to sing these songs. I did sing and still do and it's always the same. I think of Timmie and I want to bust out in a song. Of course no one could ever hear me, and you won't either. I had my adventure when it came time to decide rather to stay or go and I chose to leave the Navy for a few reasons. One the Navy started letting women onboard ships. Well I didn't want to be involved in that mess and I wanted to return to Kentucky and find her. Where's Timmie?
Well I got out of the Navy quicker than I wanted. My dad died while working on a church, so I was rushed out of the service and went home to a funeral. I was numb at all that was happening around me. When I got a chance to get to the phone I called Timmie's number and her mom answered the phone. I asked to speak to Timmie and her mom said she was in Florida. My heart sank. I felt like I was hit in the chest. I was so bummed. So I finally got a job at a rock quarry and just started to party my life away. I hooked up with some guys at work and I met Barbie.
Well I thought I would give this marriage thing a try. I didn't really love Barbie, but I love her daughter Beth. So we were married and started a family. Well it didn't work out. She slept with another man and I had enough. I still was in love with Timmie. I would often think of her, at work I would sing to her and no one would know because you can't hear over the compressor while I was drilling holes in the rock. We divorce and I had the kids. Great me with three kids and I felt all alone. I did have help and I was just getting really depressed at this time. Plus my lungs were getting worst. I got sick one day and I couldn't hardly move because my back was killing me, then I saw a doctor who sent me to another doctor and that's when I found out that my lungs were in trouble, but I didn't listen. I still wanted Timmie. By now Timmie was becoming a entity that I was starting to put on a pedestal. So while going this period of sickness, three kids and school, daycare and awful social workers. I was going into deep depression and starting to drink more than I really should of. I was drinking a six pack a day and was even starting to knock down a few during lunch. I was a mess. I wanted to escape again.
Well I knew that the way I was heading was not the road I wanted to travel so I needed to find someone to love. I wanted to find someone who I could love and that they would love and I wanted find a girl that only I could love. Someone that if another man looked at her they wouldn't even think of taking her away from me. So I join this Plus Size singles group. Well I found out that they met a pizza place that has a buffet. How ironic is that? So I went to the meetings and found myself with women that thought I was the hottest thing that ever came close to them. I felt so awkward when I found out that two of these women wanted me bad. Not for a meaningful relationship but for a good time in the sack. I wouldn't sleep with them, because I knew if I did that I would be mark as theirs and that I wouldn't find one that would love me for me and not for sex. I want more than just a sexual relationship. Sex to me, in a relationship is a bonus, I want more out of a relationship. I met Eydie. She was cute. She had a very pretty face. She looked so cute to me. I remember her with the bangs and a ponytail. I thought about how cute she was. So I wanted to date her. She seemed to like the fact I was single and I was raising three kids on my own. We dated. So I asked her to marry me and she said yes. I know she wasn't Timmie, but I knew that Timmie was a pipe dream. Timmie was gone and I needed to live my life and forget her. I just couldn't. I did love Eydie, and to be honest I still do, to some degree. I am sorry that I got sicker and I was always too sick to do anything with her. So we had our problems. One was we never talked. She was too busy talking to her mother and friends and I felt that when we did talk it was always about how wrong I am and not on what was the real problems. Well during the 90's I was getting so depressed that I really was giving up on life. I was ready to die. I felt less than a man. I couldn't do the things I wanted to do. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't take care of anything. I hated to have people do things for me. I was useless. In 1996 we got a computer. There I went and searched for Timmie. I went to Classmates dot com and there I found out that little Timmie Spencer was now Timmie Green. My depression grew. I looked her up and the search results showed that Timmie Green lived only thirty minutes away from me. Well I stalk this woman for three days. I stopped the stalking because I got too scared. I call her just to hear her voice. I quit because I wasn't sure if it was really her. I knew I still Love Timmie, I knew I loved Timmie more than Eydie.
Well in March 2005 I ended up in the hospital again on a ventilator. There I told the staff I wanted a transplant. Jewish hospital jumped at the chance. Well I had the Double Lung transplant on Dec. 2 2005. However Eydie had found another and she cheated on me. She wanted him and I was out. Once they cheat on you, they aren't worth SH*T. They are not to be trusted ever.
I was forced out of the house and I was homeless. Living in the van. I had no place to go or anyone to help.
I went into total darkness depression. I was at the end that I had a choice to make. Live or Die. It's a scary place to be. To sit in the dark, your world, life has ended and your left to decide if tomorrow is worth waking up for. That night I almost ended my life. I debated if I was ever going to take my med or just sit in my van and die. I looked at my life and wonder what went wrong. I cried out for help. I cried out for Timmie. I cried out and got no response. I was in darkness. I was alone and nobody cared. I wanted to die. So I prepared myself to die. I went and bought myself a case of Budwiser. I was going to drive the van deep into the woods and hide. Drink myself till I died. I wasn't going to take my meds and just in three days I would be a bad memory. Well I got the beer and I found a nice dark place to hide. Now I have spent the week in the van and I was ready. I had talked to myself till I couldn't talk any more. I was now just crying. Drinking one after another. I looked at my medicine and I was ready to pitch them out the window.
Then it hit me. Wait a minute, nobody is bitching at me. Nobody is telling me about my tone, my voice or anything else. I am not listening to a spoiled bitch telling me how wrong I am. How I don't appreciate my new lungs. I realize that I didn't lose my family. I lost a fat bitch. I don't need her. She can have her illiterate alcoholic pill pushing parasite. A man twenty years younger than her and he doesn't even know how many kids he has or if he is even divorce. I thought about was a dumbass she is. He doesn't love her, everybody knows he is just using her. Hell he is going around telling everyone how bad she is in bed, (I could of told him that), and laughing at her behind her back! Then I realize that I was happy that it was over. Hey I have a new life and no whore wife is going to bring me down. So I poured out the rest of the beer and went to start a new life. The bad part was I would never have the relationship with my son again. So I divorce her slutty ass. Sure I was screwed in the divorce, it was me against her and her parents. I was done dirty, but that's ok. I am free of the them and their bullshit.
So I lived with my mom for a few months and they got tired of me because going through a divorce is hard to deal with, especially when they wouldn't let talk to my son. So I got an apartment and a job and I was feeling good about myself. Well I was once again seeking a friend. I don't like being alone. I like to have someone next to me. I want to feel a warm body next to mine. I want to reach out at night and hold someone next to me. So I join the dating web sites. I met on girl, holy shit what a face. We talked, but damn she had a face that looked someone farted. Well she was good therapy. She let me vent and was great at helping get my life straighten out. Well I joined Match.com.
I met Jo. What can I say about Jo. Jo is one special woman. She works so hard and is so unappreciated for all she does. I am very fond Jo . I love Jo. She is a perfect fit for me. She has helped me , mentally. She knows me and knows that I am still not completely over my divorce. Jo has a sense of humor that she know how to make me laugh. I can't say enough about Jo because she such a wonderful person. However we kinda grew apart. February 2010, I get a friend request on facebook. My heart jumps! It's from little Timmie Spencer! Oh can it be her? I accepted! Oh can this be real? I have so much I want to say to her, but now I am scared to say anything because I don't want to lose her again. So we did small talk. I didn't want to screw this up. Sadly her mother wasn't doing well and she had to fly back the Kentucky. She gave me her phone number. I was giddy, I was excited. So I called her and she was at the airport in Atlanta. I sounded like a moron when I spoke to her. After we hung up, I yelled what an idiot I sounded like. . I called her because I wanted to ask her out for dinner and she said that she was going to her brothers and I asked if I could call her later and she yes. I called her back and then I asked her if I could take her out for dinner. Oh I was ten feet tall. I got in my car and told Vicky, ( my cars name), we are going to see the Love of my life. I got to Mt. Washington and stopped to buy a dozen roses and on I went to see the woman that I have carried a torch for , for thirty five years. When I got there I was greeted by Erin and I hid the roses behind my back as I stepped in the door. There she was, Timmie. After all these years. Still the prettiest girl in school. My heart jumped. I felt a tingle... I handed her the flowers and wrapped my arms around her and told her, "I let you go once, I will not let you go again". I didn't want to let her go. All these years I prayed and dreamed of holding her in my arms again. Now here she is, in my arms. The tiny flame in my heart that smoldered for years, now was a raging bonfire in my heart. My love was back in my arms and I wanted to keep her forever. So when we were alone I told her the truth. I have loved you for thirty five years and I will never stop loving you. I love Timmie . It's a love that's hard to explain, but I am so happy and I feel my whole life is complete. I will always love Timmie, even if we... I don't want to think of that. I don't want to lose the girl who I have always loved leaving me again. I wouldn't want to live without her. The hardest thing for me to do was to be honest. Be honest to Jo. I didn't want to hurt Jo. I knew deep down I had to. I love Jo, but not the way I love Timmie. So I told Jo the truth. I know it hurt her really bad and feel like a heel. Hell I feel scum. I know what's it's like to be hurt and I didn't want to hurt her. I love Timmie and I had to tell her.
I do love Timmie and everyday I tell her how much I love her. Everyday I tell her how beautirful she is. She is the Love of my life. She is the woman that I want to spend the rest of my life with. She is my everything. I love to sing love songs to her and express my love to her. I just hope I can make her as happy as I am. She is my one and only, I couldn't live without her. I hope that we can become one. I have a fear of her saying NO, if I ask her the big question. For 35 years I have Loved this woman, I hope to love her for 35 more years.
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I Met My True Love
by Celest Marvilla
I met my one true love when I was in college hence at that time we were just classmates/schoolmates and was not attracted to each other. Time flies, after 10 years we had communication, exchanging messages to each other but didn’t push through to a more serious relationship.
I was surprise one day when he sent me a message online asking how am I and if we could meet to chat. I then decided to give it a try anyway it’s been a long time that he’s been trying to probe his feelings to me. We started going out learned about each other’s past. Both of us are in a relationship a few years back. But now both of us are happy, enjoying each other’s company.
He courted me, treated me the way I really dreamt of and felt his love all the time that we were together. It was the first time I felt this way to a person and was loved in return. We were so happy, we have plans for the future, laugh at it and he even suggests to save and get married. I was so excited when I heard those to him. But sometimes good things come to an end.
He just walked away with me without saying a word, I waited for him to come back, swallowed my pride and tried to reach out but he doesn’t replied to my message and ignored my calls. I just want him to know that I loved him so much and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
After 15 years of waiting we just end up like that and now he has a family of his own. It never came into my mind that he will tie a knot to any girl coz all I want from him is his commitment. Thou I don’t have regret in loving him even in the simplest way; he just didn’t give me a chance to prove to him how much he mean to me. He just can’t wait for me since I still have a lot of dreams to be fulfilled and responsibilities to attend to.
One by one, I achieved my goals hence the consequence of those are not having you forever. I understand what happened to us and I will always will… Take care cheesecake, you will always be my Dee forever…
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A Love That Was Sealed In My Heart
by Sweetzel Taayan
I’m Bradella but my friends call me Brandy; I am 14 years old and a sophomore. I am the average kind of girl; I’m not popular however I got good grades in all my subjects. But honestly I hate school. I only have few friends whom I can trust; I am not new to my school hence I’ve been studying there for 8 years since my first grade. I’m just not the out-goer type, I am shy-I just stay at home during Saturdays and Sundays and even during holidays. I don’t also attend much to parties even if they had invited me.
Let me start my story during the opening of school; I enter my school with my small bag filled with paper, a notebook and a ballpen. It always been like that during first days, we don’t go on with classes immediately, we use that day to introduce ourselves.
I went to my classroom; it’d been filled up with some students I knew and some students which I only knew by faces, I’ve seen them during freshmen years. I went to put my bag on a vacant sit on the center row, and then headed back outside to look for my friends. I saw Eunice one of my closest friends. We talk for awhile until we heard the bell rung signaling for the morning ceremony. We do this everyday-sing the national anthem, and pray. After it the bell would ring again signaling the start of classes.
My adviser was a guy-he is tall, a little bit chubby and white. He seems to be funny and exciting. He introduces himself to us, he is Mr. Valcour, and he’s also our biology teacher.
Next thing, he let us introduce ourselves one by one. The first boy on the first row was the first one. I look at him and listen; he’s one of the coolest guys during elementary years, and of course ‘till now. He changed a lot but still good looking. I knew him but I didn’t know his name. It’s the first we’re on the same class-that’s why.
He’s names is Damian. He also mentions his hobbies-like playing the guitar, one of the best volleyball players in our school varsity and etc. isn’t that cool? I love guitars and I wish I could have one, but frankly-I don’t know how to play it. I love singing, some says I have a good voice-but who knows they just don’t want to hurt my feelings.
I’ve been busy looking at him, and didn’t even realize it was my turn. My teacher called my attention over and over until he came right next to me and pinch my cheeks, yanking me back to the present. Its very embarassing, everyone laugh including my teacher except for him. He just look at me with he’s cold eyes. I force a smile focusing my attention to the class. I stood up reciting my name, my hobbies and some things they didn’t know about me.
After classes I went to my friendss and discussed the things that happened. I told them my story and then they laugh and laugh-but I didn’t feel offended, because after all it was the most embarassing thing that ever happened to me.
A few days later, I’ve developing feelings for him, but I didn’t mind because this happens to me-as a teenager. A new crush-that’s it. But I wonder why it only occurred to me this time when I met him everyday during gradeschool. I didn’t knew the answer but I didn’t bothered to asks my friends though, because some might betray me, so I just kept it as a secret.
I’ve been seeing him everyday, looking at him everyday, stealing glances at him everyday until days turns into months. And these feelings grew deeper and deeper until I can’t hide it anymore. But as a shy girl, I’ve been cautious to all my actions. But now I knew him even more. He isn’t what I thought the first time he look at me. I thought he is cold and rude but no-he isn’t like that at all. He is kind and funny, sometimes we talk and he makes me laugh. We became bestfriends or rather friends…
Or whatever you call it we just became close friends and many had been jealous about it.
Those times when we talk and laugh together –I like it. I even wanted us to stay like that forever but I have to spoil those moments because I have to remind myself about my growing feelings for him. I don’t want to tell him because I’m afraid he doesn’t feel the same way.
One day, he came to me and I saw he’s eyes filled with gloom. I ask him what is wrong and he told me without hesitation that he just broke up with he’s girlfriend-Stella. Stella belongs to the popular girls and she almost had everything I do not have. But the negative side of her is being bossy; she’s been my classmate a few times.
I knew he loved her a lot; our schoolmetes even called them the HS sweethearts. To all our conversations together she was the only subject, so I can’t help getting jealous. I remember one time when I really get jealous that cause me to leave him alone. That was when we are in the library doing our projects together. He was the one who started up the conversation and I was like saying to myself ‘I’m full of this’ and ‘I’m full of that’, ‘could you please stop it’. I stood up picking my things not realizing what I’m doing. He asked me where I am going. And I said I was going to the comfort room. He asked me again, why I need to bring my stuffs in the comfort room. I didn’t know what to say next so I headed to the door leaving him behind. When I opened the door, Stella and her friends went coming in. I didn’t do anything I just let them in first before I can get out. As I closed the door, I look back to Damian as Stella went approaching him.
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‘Now that he’s single, maybe you could use this chance’, my mind argues with me, but I didn’t listen. Yes, I might be inlove with my bestfriend but no, I can’t use this opportunity he needed a friend right now-not a lover.
I comforted him, letting his pain fades away, and letting him cry. I was surprised when he said; “you’re the only one who accepts me when I cry. She said, boy’s doesn’t cry because it’s a sign of weakness. Although I didn’t believe her, and I wanted to tell her it’s not a sign of weakness but rather it’s a sign of being real. I cried many times not letting her know, because when she did-she would leave me. So I tried not to cry because I love her. But when I saw her with somebody I felt betrayed and abandoned-.”
“But I’m always here,” I said.
“Yes, you’re always there. That’s why I’m very thankful that I have you.”
I let him continue what he was saying earlier.”-I cried and she saw me. You know what happened next?”
I looked at him, my eyes starting to water but I turned away to wipe them.”She broke up with you” I said slowly and quietly, that I’m not sure if he heard me.
He managed to smile a little; (yeah I guessed he heard what I said).” No, she didn’t…” he said, still tears falling down his angelic face.”…I broke up with her.”
I was shocked; I thought he loved her, why would he break up with her?
Is that really what love is? - To let go?
“Why?” I asked.
He grabbed my hankerchief into my arms and use it to wipe he’s tears.” I realized she’s not worth it.”
“But you love her.”
“I love her but I also realized its just one sided.”
I gasped and and covered my mouth. “How dare she?”
He just smiled. “I guessed she didn’t love me the way I’d loved her. When I broke up with her she didn’t even cry, I thought she would but she didn’t, however she said ‘thank you’.”
I gasped again. In disbelief I told myself, ‘who wouldn’t love this boy who is ever so loving, caring and honest? Maybe he’s the last kind of good natured boys who thinks love is a precious thing.’
We fell silent for a moment, and then he straightened up and said,” I guess I’ll just wait for the right girl to come, for the moment I will focus to my studies as I wait for her,’
It’s been a while since he uttered that word ‘studies’ he’s been busy wasting his time with Stella the past few months.
I smiled and he smiled back, the kind of smile he gave to Stella everyday, the smile I had been longing since the day I saw him.
The next day he arrives at school early than the usual time he came 5 mins. Before the bell would ring, he’d been late many times.
‘He’s really looking forward to his studies,’ I observed.
After classes we meet at the library to do our homeworks, that’s the only chance we talk and be with each other. Rumor has it that it was because of me Damian and Stella broke up. It begun to spread to the whole campus, but I didn’t mind-as long as I am with him, I’ll be fine, safe and protected.
As days passed, he didn’t talk about Stella anymore nor mention her name once. It made me happy though for some reason it also made me sad, it is as if theres some thing he doesn’t want to tell me, things that kept he’s heart shattering into pieces.
The next day was Saturday; he called me to go out, but difinitely not a date-just going out as friends. I always hesitate when he’s asking me to go out, because I’m not an out-goer-remember. But today I didn’t hesitate nor think twice, I heard the trembling of his voice on the phone-he has been crying. I told him I’ll be there a minute and he said he’ll meet at the park.
I rode a taxi going to our meeting place. I saw him sitting on the bench-alone. I immediately approach him and saw he’s face all red from crying.
I fumbled in my pocket for my hankerchief and offered it to him as I sit beside him. He was relly boo-hooing now, and passerby’s wouls stop and stare at us. He didn’t mind-I to didn’t mind. He started talking about what had happened. He told me he’d seen Stella with that guy again, and admitted he still didn’t get over her. And then suddenly he asked me this question, “If I’m gone will you miss me?”
I stared at him and I can not move. How would I react? He isn’t joking around, he’s serious. I run those words into my mind…
If I’m gone will you miss me?
If I’m gone will you miss me?
If I’m gone will you miss me....?
The things that first came into my mind were, he’s telling me he wants to kill himself or want to far away. Why would he need to run away? It made me cry from the thought itself, I turned around so he wouldn’t notice it.
He looks at me waiting for my response but nothing came into my mouth and it hurts me and made me cry even more.
Love is so unconditional; if only I’ve seen it coming I should have controlled and fought it. This situation is too hard. It’s too hard to stand and to hard to bare.
When will he ever realized how much I love him?
Why did I fall inlove with my bestfriend?
We are two people put together, but couldn’t be together due to moral senses. I felt torn and devastated. I had to admit the fact that all he can give me is friendship and nothing more.
Is this all we`d ever be? Is this all we ever could be?
Why wouldn’t he just choose me, and let me be the one?
Why can’t be the two of us?
Why can’t he love me?
I hate seeing him hurting himself and I hate to ruin this friendship though I love him.
I love even he loves someone else-someone who doesn’t deserve these tears. She’s not the one who’s always on he’s side when he need a shoulder to lean on, she’s not when he needs somebody to care for him, she’s not there when he feels lonely…
She wasn’t there. She never did.
I was the one who is always there for him.
I’m the one cares for him for than I care for myself.
Why does he need to feel this way for her?
These where the things I wanted to tell him-but can not.
He continued to tell me something more but I did not intended to listen until I heard ‘dropping and ‘migrating’.
I asked him about it and he said, ‘he’s dropping school and they’re migrating to US’.
My heart started to break apart. US! I don’t think I could get any farther away.
I musn’t cry; letting him get away might be the only way he can get he’s heart back and to let him start again.
I must let him go for the best…
I must let him go to find he’s way-he’s life…
I must let him go to find the better girl for him that will love him and care more that I do…
And I must let him go for I love him and wish all the best…
Without telling him how much I love him.
Before we went apart he gave me something to remember, a bracelet that he had kept for Stella but hadn’t gave it. He wanted me to keep it and to take good care of it.
So that day we bid goodbye to each other and hug for the very last time. In my mind I said, ‘if we don’t cross ever again-I bid you goodbye…forever, my best friend and my only love. I love you forever.’
Weeks and months had passed since the day he left. And I’m still hoping that someday he’ll come back… and someday…I wish he’ll also feel the same way about me.
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This Is My Love Story
by Ken Brown
In 1973 we moved from the hills of eastern Kentucky back to Louisville. I was glad to see that we were coming back home. The years spent in the hills I didn't care to much for the snobs I went to school with. The best part of Eastern Kentucky was the fishing, you can have the rest. Anyway we didn't move to Louisville, we moved to Shepherdsville. What a one horse town. Sundown the place was dead. It was great to live in a small town.
Well I was fond of the opposite sex. In fact I was perverted even back then. I remember going over to one of my Mom and Dad's friend house and I would sneak into the basement and I found his stash of Playboys and Penthouses, I was in heaven. I tore pictures out, but I really got into reading on how to make Love to a woman. So with that I was ready if the opportunity came.
Well the first girl I liked was Katrina S. I met her in Art class and she was cute as can be. I was nervous when I tried to talk to her. I never did tell her how I felt because one thing I was scared as hell. Plus nobody dates guys who are fat. Yes I was a lardo. So I kept a lot of feelings to myself. I wanted to say "Hey I like you." However I was a big chicken. So I never expressed myself.
Then there was Treasa B. Oh was she good looking. She was a pretty little girl with Braces. For some reason Braces seem to turn me on. I guess it stems from the first girl I ever kissed, Darlene W. You never forget your first kiss. I liked Treasa a lot. Once she was sick and I felt so sorry for her, so I wanted to send her some flowers. That what you do when someone is sick. So I went to the local florist and told them I wanted to buy flowers for a friend that was sick. The suggested Yellow Roses! I said no not Yellow, she has Yellow Jaundice. So I knew girls like roses so I sent a dozen red roses, not thinking about the romantic aspect of sending red roses. I hope I didn't send her the wrong message, even though I liked her. I did take her out once, but it wasn't a date. Just riding around having fun. I never told her how I felt, still a big Chicken. I didn't want to get laughed at.
I got a part in the school play. I was the Rabbi in Fiddler on the Roof. I loved being in the play. You know I am a ham anyway. Well on night during practice I met and fell in love with a girl that took my heart. She was beautiful. She had long black hair and a face that when I looked at her I would just die inside. She was the prettiest girl in high school to me. She told me her name and I knew that she is the girl for me. Her name was and is Timmie. Oh how that name would turn me on. Her voice was like music and her smile would drive me wild inside. I fell so madly in love with her. She had my heart. We dated and we had fun. I had an old beat up Ford Galaxie and it was a POS. However it serve us well. Oh Timmie was all that I thought about. She was the greatest cook I ever met. She used to make me cakes and let me tell you, her cakes were to die for. Made from scratch. Oh how I loved her cakes. I think I gained ten pounds with her. I was so in Loved with her that I wasn't thinking about how to make our relationship better. It was great to be with Timmie. I think she got bored with me.
One day I was at work and she showed up with another. My heart broke. It felt like I was kicked in the chest. Pain filled me and I ran to back room and cried. I heard someone call my name and I tried to straighten myself up as not to look like I was crying. well then I knew that my love of my life had found another. So I gave him her and let her go. I remember the night she told me it was over. I left the farm that night in tears. I still Loved her.
After losing Timmie, I wanted to find someone else to take the pain away. I couldn't. My heart was set on Timmie. So I just looked at other women as just there to fill a void. Well I was unlucky at finding anyone and I was tired of living in Kentucky. Jimmy Carter was president and the country was a mess. No jobs and no hope for me. So I joined the Navy. I wanted to escape from, family, rednecks, Bullitt County and try to get over Timmie. I spent a longer time in boot camp because I was a fat ass. They wanted me to get into shape, ( I was a shape, pear shape, that's a shape right?). So I was put into a group of other lardos and we exercised daily.. I got to where I could run a mile in ten minutes. Well then I finished boot camp and was returning home for a visit. I wanted to fined Timmie but she wasn't around. I was so bummed out that I couldn't see her. I wanted to show off my new look. I was really disappointed when the Navy assigned me to the USS Wabash. I couldn't believe it. Here I was escaping the Kentuckian area and they stick me on the Wabash. When I got to the ship, well I wasn't impressed. It was in the ship yards getting a refit. Turns out she was an oiler. Like a 7-11 on the high seas. We delivered food, mail and fuel to the fleet. So I went through some training on how to work on this ship.
Well I found myself in a bar close to the ship and I met Sandy G. she reminded me a lot of Timmie. She was a Timmie's replacement. So we dated and I asked her to marry me, but when it came near to time to marry. I backed out. She wasn't Timmie. So after her I just treated women as objects and never really love them. Just gave them what they wanted and really didn't respect them. After all they were sleeping with me. I enjoyed the time I spent in the Navy. Many nights out at sea I would look up into the night sky, see the billions of stars and think about Timmie. I decided that I had to get out and find her. I still loved Timmie. I said a lot prayers and wished on many stars that one day I could see her again. I wouldn't let my love for her die. I would listen to Love songs and just think about Timmie and would want to sing these songs. I did sing and still do and it's always the same. I think of Timmie and I want to bust out in a song. Of course no one could ever hear me, and you won't either. I had my adventure when it came time to decide rather to stay or go and I chose to leave the Navy for a few reasons. One the Navy started letting women onboard ships. Well I didn't want to be involved in that mess and I wanted to return to Kentucky and find her. Where's Timmie?
Well I got out of the Navy quicker than I wanted. My dad died while working on a church, so I was rushed out of the service and went home to a funeral. I was numb at all that was happening around me. When I got a chance to get to the phone I called Timmie's number and her mom answered the phone. I asked to speak to Timmie and her mom said she was in Florida. My heart sank. I felt like I was hit in the chest. I was so bummed. So I finally got a job at a rock quarry and just started to party my life away. I hooked up with some guys at work and I met Barbie.
Well I thought I would give this marriage thing a try. I didn't really love Barbie, but I love her daughter Beth. So we were married and started a family. Well it didn't work out. She slept with another man and I had enough. I still was in love with Timmie. I would often think of her, at work I would sing to her and no one would know because you can't hear over the compressor while I was drilling holes in the rock. We divorce and I had the kids. Great me with three kids and I felt all alone. I did have help and I was just getting really depressed at this time. Plus my lungs were getting worst. I got sick one day and I couldn't hardly move because my back was killing me, then I saw a doctor who sent me to another doctor and that's when I found out that my lungs were in trouble, but I didn't listen. I still wanted Timmie. By now Timmie was becoming a entity that I was starting to put on a pedestal. So while going this period of sickness, three kids and school, daycare and awful social workers. I was going into deep depression and starting to drink more than I really should of. I was drinking a six pack a day and was even starting to knock down a few during lunch. I was a mess. I wanted to escape again.
Well I knew that the way I was heading was not the road I wanted to travel so I needed to find someone to love. I wanted to find someone who I could love and that they would love and I wanted find a girl that only I could love. Someone that if another man looked at her they wouldn't even think of taking her away from me. So I join this Plus Size singles group. Well I found out that they met a pizza place that has a buffet. How ironic is that? So I went to the meetings and found myself with women that thought I was the hottest thing that ever came close to them. I felt so awkward when I found out that two of these women wanted me bad. Not for a meaningful relationship but for a good time in the sack. I wouldn't sleep with them, because I knew if I did that I would be mark as theirs and that I wouldn't find one that would love me for me and not for sex. I want more than just a sexual relationship. Sex to me, in a relationship is a bonus, I want more out of a relationship. I met Eydie. She was cute. She had a very pretty face. She looked so cute to me. I remember her with the bangs and a ponytail. I thought about how cute she was. So I wanted to date her. She seemed to like the fact I was single and I was raising three kids on my own. We dated. So I asked her to marry me and she said yes. I know she wasn't Timmie, but I knew that Timmie was a pipe dream. Timmie was gone and I needed to live my life and forget her. I just couldn't. I did love Eydie, and to be honest I still do, to some degree. I am sorry that I got sicker and I was always too sick to do anything with her. So we had our problems. One was we never talked. She was too busy talking to her mother and friends and I felt that when we did talk it was always about how wrong I am and not on what was the real problems. Well during the 90's I was getting so depressed that I really was giving up on life. I was ready to die. I felt less than a man. I couldn't do the things I wanted to do. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't take care of anything. I hated to have people do things for me. I was useless. In 1996 we got a computer. There I went and searched for Timmie. I went to Classmates dot com and there I found out that little Timmie Spencer was now Timmie Green. My depression grew. I looked her up and the search results showed that Timmie Green lived only thirty minutes away from me. Well I stalk this woman for three days. I stopped the stalking because I got too scared. I call her just to hear her voice. I quit because I wasn't sure if it was really her. I knew I still Love Timmie, I knew I loved Timmie more than Eydie.
Well in March 2005 I ended up in the hospital again on a ventilator. There I told the staff I wanted a transplant. Jewish hospital jumped at the chance. Well I had the Double Lung transplant on Dec. 2 2005. However Eydie had found another and she cheated on me. She wanted him and I was out. Once they cheat on you, they aren't worth SH*T. They are not to be trusted ever.
I was forced out of the house and I was homeless. Living in the van. I had no place to go or anyone to help.
I went into total darkness depression. I was at the end that I had a choice to make. Live or Die. It's a scary place to be. To sit in the dark, your world, life has ended and your left to decide if tomorrow is worth waking up for. That night I almost ended my life. I debated if I was ever going to take my med or just sit in my van and die. I looked at my life and wonder what went wrong. I cried out for help. I cried out for Timmie. I cried out and got no response. I was in darkness. I was alone and nobody cared. I wanted to die. So I prepared myself to die. I went and bought myself a case of Budwiser. I was going to drive the van deep into the woods and hide. Drink myself till I died. I wasn't going to take my meds and just in three days I would be a bad memory. Well I got the beer and I found a nice dark place to hide. Now I have spent the week in the van and I was ready. I had talked to myself till I couldn't talk any more. I was now just crying. Drinking one after another. I looked at my medicine and I was ready to pitch them out the window.
Then it hit me. Wait a minute, nobody is bitching at me. Nobody is telling me about my tone, my voice or anything else. I am not listening to a spoiled bitch telling me how wrong I am. How I don't appreciate my new lungs. I realize that I didn't lose my family. I lost a fat bitch. I don't need her. She can have her illiterate alcoholic pill pushing parasite. A man twenty years younger than her and he doesn't even know how many kids he has or if he is even divorce. I thought about was a dumbass she is. He doesn't love her, everybody knows he is just using her. Hell he is going around telling everyone how bad she is in bed, (I could of told him that), and laughing at her behind her back! Then I realize that I was happy that it was over. Hey I have a new life and no whore wife is going to bring me down. So I poured out the rest of the beer and went to start a new life. The bad part was I would never have the relationship with my son again. So I divorce her slutty ass. Sure I was screwed in the divorce, it was me against her and her parents. I was done dirty, but that's ok. I am free of the them and their bullshit.
So I lived with my mom for a few months and they got tired of me because going through a divorce is hard to deal with, especially when they wouldn't let talk to my son. So I got an apartment and a job and I was feeling good about myself. Well I was once again seeking a friend. I don't like being alone. I like to have someone next to me. I want to feel a warm body next to mine. I want to reach out at night and hold someone next to me. So I join the dating web sites. I met on girl, holy shit what a face. We talked, but damn she had a face that looked someone farted. Well she was good therapy. She let me vent and was great at helping get my life straighten out. Well I joined Match.com.
I met Jo. What can I say about Jo. Jo is one special woman. She works so hard and is so unappreciated for all she does. I am very fond Jo . I love Jo. She is a perfect fit for me. She has helped me , mentally. She knows me and knows that I am still not completely over my divorce. Jo has a sense of humor that she know how to make me laugh. I can't say enough about Jo because she such a wonderful person. However we kinda grew apart. February 2010, I get a friend request on facebook. My heart jumps! It's from little Timmie Spencer! Oh can it be her? I accepted! Oh can this be real? I have so much I want to say to her, but now I am scared to say anything because I don't want to lose her again. So we did small talk. I didn't want to screw this up. Sadly her mother wasn't doing well and she had to fly back the Kentucky. She gave me her phone number. I was giddy, I was excited. So I called her and she was at the airport in Atlanta. I sounded like a moron when I spoke to her. After we hung up, I yelled what an idiot I sounded like. . I called her because I wanted to ask her out for dinner and she said that she was going to her brothers and I asked if I could call her later and she yes. I called her back and then I asked her if I could take her out for dinner. Oh I was ten feet tall. I got in my car and told Vicky, ( my cars name), we are going to see the Love of my life. I got to Mt. Washington and stopped to buy a dozen roses and on I went to see the woman that I have carried a torch for , for thirty five years. When I got there I was greeted by Erin and I hid the roses behind my back as I stepped in the door. There she was, Timmie. After all these years. Still the prettiest girl in school. My heart jumped. I felt a tingle... I handed her the flowers and wrapped my arms around her and told her, "I let you go once, I will not let you go again". I didn't want to let her go. All these years I prayed and dreamed of holding her in my arms again. Now here she is, in my arms. The tiny flame in my heart that smoldered for years, now was a raging bonfire in my heart. My love was back in my arms and I wanted to keep her forever. So when we were alone I told her the truth. I have loved you for thirty five years and I will never stop loving you. I love Timmie . It's a love that's hard to explain, but I am so happy and I feel my whole life is complete. I will always love Timmie, even if we... I don't want to think of that. I don't want to lose the girl who I have always loved leaving me again. I wouldn't want to live without her. The hardest thing for me to do was to be honest. Be honest to Jo. I didn't want to hurt Jo. I knew deep down I had to. I love Jo, but not the way I love Timmie. So I told Jo the truth. I know it hurt her really bad and feel like a heel. Hell I feel scum. I know what's it's like to be hurt and I didn't want to hurt her. I love Timmie and I had to tell her.
I do love Timmie and everyday I tell her how much I love her. Everyday I tell her how beautirful she is. She is the Love of my life. She is the woman that I want to spend the rest of my life with. She is my everything. I love to sing love songs to her and express my love to her. I just hope I can make her as happy as I am. She is my one and only, I couldn't live without her. I hope that we can become one. I have a fear of her saying NO, if I ask her the big question. For 35 years I have Loved this woman, I hope to love her for 35 more years.
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